THOUGHTFUL THURSDAYS

I have been getting a lot more views on my blog than I ever dreamed I'd get! 

Yesterday I had over 100 views on my blog , and 20 views on my Music Fun Page! 

That is wonderful! Thank you from the bottom of my heart! 

I have been sad over the passing of Richie Havens, and obsessing over him (my favorite singer) too much, but I just have one more thing to add.

The next thing you'll be reading is the ending to my book that I wrote a few years ago.

The title is Hitchin,' God's Way Of Letting You know You Don't Have A Car.

I had forgotten that it included Richie Havens as an angel, I thought it would be fitting to share this with you now:

I had never really thought about it much until I started hitchin’. It just slipped my Mom, I guess. No one ever said anything to me about it. 

(Of course, these were “hippy” times and everyone was “trippin”; whatever that means.) If someone had “axed” me about it, I would have replied, “I don’t know.” It just didn’t seem important at the time.

However, after millions of miles of hitchin’ across deserts, over mountains and rivers, through the woods, rain, snow, sleet, dust storms, hail storms, Gale Storm; dealing with psychopathic drivers, bumble bees, little sharp tiny rocks pelting my sensitive wittle body, hunger, thirst, humiliation……………Oh, I could go on and on! 

I have? Uh, sorry ‘bout that.

Where was I? Now I merember. After all of that intense suffering, heartache and pain, I finally realized that God was trying to tell me something.

“What“, you ask in anxious anticipation. ( Try saying “anxious anticipation” three times fast.)

Now remember, I’m still sitting on a rock in Colorado. No! I don’t mean I’m sitting on a rock in Colorado at this moment! Heck no! Go to the end of chapter 6 if you’ve completely forgotton that part. We can wait……………………………….......................

It’s about time you got back! Chihuahua, you’re slower than one of those big butted people in the checkout line at Walmart! 

I apologize to all of you readers with big butts, but I’m not talking about you guys. I’m talking about those folks with MASSIVE  butts! Butts so big they need their own zip code! Butts that look like two Volkswagons trying to pass each other! Butts soooo enormous ……………………….Tell me to shut up. Thank you, I needed that.

O.K. I’m sitting on this stupid rock and I “imagine” an angel standing in front of me. This was not your ordinary, average, run of the mill, angel. Oh, no! This angel looked exactly like Richie Havens, but was about 60 feet tall. 

The Angel spoke. 

Angel……”What’s hapnin’, Danny?”

Me……”Not much.”

Angel….”How’s the blisters on your feet?”

Me….“Oh, they’re O.K………..“Hey! How did you know…….Oh, yeah, right; Angel.”

Angel…..“God has a message for you, man.”

Me……“For me? Wow! Great; what is it?”

Angel…. “Don’t you know what it is already, dude?”

Me…. “No! This isn’t gonna be some kind of riddle or something, is it?”

Angel…..“Nooo, nooo, man, nothing like that.”

Me…. “Then what’s the message, Richie, or Gabriel or whatever your name is?”

Angel…. It’s Norman. Anyway, here is God’s message.

( This is cool because now it gets dark, rolling black clouds appear, and there is thunder and lightening flashing through the pitch blackness, like in The Ten Commandments!) 

“DANNY! DANNY BRUCE MANESS! THIS IS WHAT GOD HAS SPOKETH UNTO YOU!” “HITCHIN’ WAS MY WAY OF LETTING YOU KNOW YOU DON”T HAVE A CAR!”

Me…..Say what?

Angel……“I REPEAT; HITCHIN’ WAS MY……

Me……“RIIIIGHT!  I heard you the first time. So you’re telling me the reason I’ve been going through all this hitchin’ hogwash is because God was letting me know I didn’t have a cockadoody car?”

Angel….. “That’s right, bro.”

Me….. “Wouldn’t it have been easier for him to just email me?”

Angel…..“We don’t have emails yet, son. This is the early 70’s.”

Me…… “Well, then he could have created emails and sent me one! It would have been better than putting me through all the suffering, pain and heartache of hitchin’ my butt off!”

Angel….”Let me ask you this, ungrateful one; did you KNOW  you didn’t have a car before you started hitchin’?”

Me…..“Well, no. I never really thought about it but…………….

Angel…..“AAAHHH!  AAAHHH!”  “Would you have done all the cool things you, uh, done  if it hadn’t been for hitchin’; like seeing Tony Dow?”

Me….”You’ve got me there, Norman.” “ I have to admit I’ve seen wonderous and magnificent things along the highways and byways of the good ole U.S. of A. In fact, just yesterday………

Angel….. “Enough already! I can see that you get the point.” “I’m outta here.” (Cue music: Richie Havens singing the classic song, “Follow”), “And don’t mind me ‘cause I ain’t nothing’ but a dream; and you can follow, folloooowoooo, followoooo-oo-ooo.)

YOU NEED TO LISTEN TO THIS NOW! REALLY!

Norman begins to rise in the air and floats, floats, floats, higher and higher and POP, he’s gone!

Now, I knew why everybody said I was so dumb. I should have known I didn’t have a car. Even after hitchin’ a billion miles across the western section of America, I was too stupid to figure it out on my own. God had to send an Angel, for heaven’s sake

 (Hey! That wasn’t bad! An Angel for heaven’s  sake), to tell me!

Anyway, I finally  understood the indisputable fact that I didn’t have a car. 

Funny thing about it; I didn’t care. Like Norman said, I would have never had the strange unique experiences, met such weird, exciting and lovable people, AND (here is the most important thing), been able to write this book, if I had, had a car.

That is sooo true! I would have been cooped up in my little Rambler or some dumb car like that, by myself, missing out on everything interesting, cool, Glirkazoid related, angelic, and, well, just EVERYTHING  that has made me the diverse, whacked out critter I am today!

In conclusion, if somebody, ANYBODY, who reads this book knows Richie Havens OR  Joni Mitchell, give him/her my email address. You can find it in the book somewhere.

Wait a minute! What if Joni and Richie are reading the book TOGETHER at this very moment! Wow! OH, WOW!!!!  

No, that’s stupid for me to ever believe my favorite singers of all time, who never fail to put me THERE, would read my idiotic book. Also, Joni Mitchell is the greatest songwriter of all time (Excluding Lennon, Dylan, and Manilow); it’s absolutely CRAZY for me to even dream in my wildest dreams she would like my dumb book, ‘cause I’m nothing but a “silly-boy” writer compared to her writing.

 (Pssst, gang, listen up. See what I’m trying to do? I’m hoping Richie and Joni hear about my love for them in some way (Maybe through the “grapevine”) and show pity on me and throw a big party in my honor where they both perform their awesome, AWESOME, AWESOME  music!!!!!! 

I just got a chill up my leg! What if other celebrities hear about the party and the guest list includes Halle Berry, Steve Martin, Chuck Norris (See what I’m doing now? I’m fantasizing about all these other celebrities coming to the party I’m fantasizing about), Greg Batton, The Aposematics, Robin Williams, Yvonne Greer, Michael Buble, Michael Lynche, Adam Lambert, Crystal Bowersox (She‘s wonderful) , Cameron Diaz, Ben Stein, Martha Stew…….zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.