Steve The Plant Steve The Plant, can he talk, no he can't,

But he's a hoot, like my great aunt,

Can he walk, or galavant,

Of course not, steve's a plant!

Steve The Plant, Steve The Plant, will never curse and rant,

He just sits upon the sill, resembling Oscar Levant,

Watching traffic patterns, much like that dude named "Grant,"

Greg and Dan kneel close to him, and recite this ancient chant.

Steve The Plant, Steve The Plant, make this show a worldwide smash, Steve The Plant, Steve The Plant, if you don't we'll kick your .....

Steve The Plant, Steve The Plant, make this show a worldwide smash, Steve The Plant, Steve The Plant, if you don't we'll kick your .....