OUT OF THIS WORLD WEDNESDAY
CHAPTER IX
In this strange dimension, on the planet of Sophomore, it would soon be the first full moon after the spring equinox, when the Golden Chicken Of Kluck comes to life, and begins to lay platinum eggs for 24 hours straight, so it is imperative that the Fab Five grabs the chicken before 3:37 in the afternoon, while the chicken is still inanimate!
Ever try to catch a chicken that is running around, and laying platinum eggs that you can stumble over?
I didn't think so!
The Silver Sausage spazeship has landed at a remote location on the Flying Fortress Of Platinum Island, and the Fab Five begin to map out their plan!
It is exactly 5:37 in the morning...
Gary - "You all realize that Swyparooski is going to throw everything he has against us to keep his precious Golden Chicken Of Kluck that he stole from our planet Glirka, right?"
The Fab Five, minus Gary - "RIGHT!"
Gary - "You also know that Swyparooski can inflict some of the most painful torture that can be inflicted on creatures that oppose him, right?"
The Fab Five, minus Gary and Rosie - "Uh, right?"
Gary - "You dudes seem a bit apprehensive."
Big Gaz - "Torture? Nobody ever said anything about torture!"
Gounderus - "What kind of torture?"
Gary - "Like I said, PAINFUL, EXCRUCIATING, I WANT MY MOMMY kind of torture!"
Rosie - "Gary!! Shut your mouth! You're just trying to scare them away, so they don't get any part of the Golden Chicken and platinum eggs, that, by the way, are ALL going back to the Museum Of Chicken Artifacts on Glirka!
We are doing this mission pro-bono, remember? We are all SUPPOSED to be altruistic super heroes, kapeesh?"
Rhymesauce, Gounderus and Big Gaz - "Kapeesh!"
Rhymesauce - "Swyparooski, torture, maybe nailed to a tree, altruistic, pro-bono, doin' it for free!"
All of a sudden, the evil, viscious, bloodthirsty forces of Swyparooski descend upon the Fab Five!
There are demon-like creatures flying at them, zombie creatures, wanting to eat their brains, mechanical walking machines (like in Star Wars), shooting lasers at them, uniformed soldiers, firing blasters at them, and a whole host of other characters, that will make for a big budget when the movie is filmed!
In quick, lethal response, the Fab Five utilize their warrior skills to stave off the overwhelming forces of Swyparooski!
Gounderus mows down hundreds of them with his gopher chucks, Rhymesauce is able to slay many more by using a pen knife and the "cloak of invisibility," Big Gaz, strengthened by his power tonic, destroys a thousand or more with his bare hands, Rosie takes care of a multitude of the enemy with her kick-yo-bott martial arts skills, along with her little blaster, and Gary is nowhere to be seen!!
The time is exactly 3:00 in the afternoon, already!
Swyparooski - "Bosco, they've beaten ALL of my evil forces, and there is only you to guard me and the Golden Chicken Of Kluck! Bosco? Bosco!! Where are you, Bosco?!!"
At that, Gary blasts his way into Swyparooski's chamber!
It is exactly 3:15 in the afternoon!
Gary - "Sooo, we meet again, after 222,000 years! Now, hand over the Golden Chicken Of Kluck that is on that table next to your throne!"
Swyparooski - "What Golden Chicken Of Kluck? I see no Golden Chicken Of Kluck!"
Gary - "It's right there on that table next to you, now, hand it over, you, you bad guy!"
It's exactly 3:30 in the afternoon!
Swyparooski - "Seriously, my old friend, I'd hand it over if I could see it, but, alas, I have no idea what you're talking about!"
Gary - "You're stalling, you monster! You know that it will soon be 3:37 and the Golden Chicken will come back to life and start laying platinum eggs, which will make it next to impossible to catch!"
Swyparooski "Ha ha ha ha ha ha! Correct, Sherlock! You are now facing defeat in the face, you little twerp! It's 3:37 and LOOK, the Golden Chicken Of Kluck is ALIVE, it's ALIVE I tell you!!!"
This is when all heck breaks lose, and the Golden Chicken begins clucking wildly, running all around the chamber, flying a bit, and laying platinum eggs by the hundreds!!
Swyparooski laughs that irritating, echoing, evil laugh...
Swyparooski - "Ha haaaa ha haaaa haaaaa! You will never catch me, or the Golden Chicken Of Kluck now, you miserable little Glirkazoid lackey!"
All of a sudden the Fab Five, minus Gary, rush in, corral the Golden Chicken Of Kluck, gather all of the platinum eggs, and then Rhymesauce, Big Gaz and Gounderus take the chicken and eggs back to the Silver Sausage, where for the remaining 23 hours, they can beam the Golden Chicken and all of the platinum eggs she lays, to the Museum Of Chicken Artifacts on Glirka!
Swyparooski - "Sooo, what are you two gonna do to me, huh? Torture me? Emulsificate me? Cut me into little pieces, and feed meto the teridacktalls...teradaktles...I never could spell pterodactyls!"
Rosie - "No, Swyparooski! We realize you have kleptomania, and will send you to Happy Stars Mental Health Facility to find your inner, honest self."
Swyparooski - "The hell you will!"
In an instant, Swyparooski whips out his concealed carry emulsificator and takes a shot at sweet Rosie!
Rosie leans away from the blast (like in The Matrix movie)
and then Gary emulsificates Swyparooski into a liquid puddle on the floor, where Swyparooski's dawg licks up the puddle! Kind of sickening, but true!
Gary - "Where are the rest of the Fab Five, Rosie?"
Rosie - "They took the treasured Golden Chicken Of Kluck and platinum eggs back to the Silver Sausage to send it all back to Glirka, to the..."
Gary - "They WHAT!!! Rosie!!! They are a million light years away from us by now! How could we be so dumb to let them take all the precious loot away from..."
Rosie - "Shut up, dufus! I'm getting a message! (Rosie is responding to her message) Uh, huh. Yes. Got it. Thank you!"
Gary - "Was that our so-called friends, gloating over their ill gotten gains?!!"
Rosie - "No, actually it was the Museum Of Chicken Artifacts on Glirka, thanking us for sending back the Golden Chicken Of Kluck and platinum eggs, that, by the way, are still being beamed there as we speak!"
Gary - "Well, those sons of biscuit eaters! I underestimated them and falsely accused them of being dishonest. I guess they have high standards, the same as you and me, Rosie!"
Rosie - "What's in that gunny sack, behind your back, Gary?"
Gary - "I don't see a gunny sack! You must be imaginating things, Rosie."
Rosie - (Talking to the Chicken Museum on her communicator) "Yeah, we overlooked a few platinum eggs, and will be sending them to you as soon as we get back on the Silver Sausage!"
Gary - "I just wanted to help the poor, and maybe spruce up the Silver Sausage a bit, take us on a needed vacation to Planet Mow-wee, buy you some gifts, for sure, send something to my destitute brother in law..."
Rosie - "Yeah, riiiiight!"
Ever try to catch a chicken that is running around, and laying platinum eggs that you can stumble over?
I didn't think so!
The Silver Sausage spazeship has landed at a remote location on the Flying Fortress Of Platinum Island, and the Fab Five begin to map out their plan!
It is exactly 5:37 in the morning...
Gary - "You all realize that Swyparooski is going to throw everything he has against us to keep his precious Golden Chicken Of Kluck that he stole from our planet Glirka, right?"
The Fab Five, minus Gary - "RIGHT!"
Gary - "You also know that Swyparooski can inflict some of the most painful torture that can be inflicted on creatures that oppose him, right?"
The Fab Five, minus Gary and Rosie - "Uh, right?"
Gary - "You dudes seem a bit apprehensive."
Big Gaz - "Torture? Nobody ever said anything about torture!"
Gounderus - "What kind of torture?"
Gary - "Like I said, PAINFUL, EXCRUCIATING, I WANT MY MOMMY kind of torture!"
Rosie - "Gary!! Shut your mouth! You're just trying to scare them away, so they don't get any part of the Golden Chicken and platinum eggs, that, by the way, are ALL going back to the Museum Of Chicken Artifacts on Glirka!
We are doing this mission pro-bono, remember? We are all SUPPOSED to be altruistic super heroes, kapeesh?"
Rhymesauce, Gounderus and Big Gaz - "Kapeesh!"
Rhymesauce - "Swyparooski, torture, maybe nailed to a tree, altruistic, pro-bono, doin' it for free!"
All of a sudden, the evil, viscious, bloodthirsty forces of Swyparooski descend upon the Fab Five!
There are demon-like creatures flying at them, zombie creatures, wanting to eat their brains, mechanical walking machines (like in Star Wars), shooting lasers at them, uniformed soldiers, firing blasters at them, and a whole host of other characters, that will make for a big budget when the movie is filmed!
In quick, lethal response, the Fab Five utilize their warrior skills to stave off the overwhelming forces of Swyparooski!
Gounderus mows down hundreds of them with his gopher chucks, Rhymesauce is able to slay many more by using a pen knife and the "cloak of invisibility," Big Gaz, strengthened by his power tonic, destroys a thousand or more with his bare hands, Rosie takes care of a multitude of the enemy with her kick-yo-bott martial arts skills, along with her little blaster, and Gary is nowhere to be seen!!
The time is exactly 3:00 in the afternoon, already!
Swyparooski - "Bosco, they've beaten ALL of my evil forces, and there is only you to guard me and the Golden Chicken Of Kluck! Bosco? Bosco!! Where are you, Bosco?!!"
At that, Gary blasts his way into Swyparooski's chamber!
It is exactly 3:15 in the afternoon!
Gary - "Sooo, we meet again, after 222,000 years! Now, hand over the Golden Chicken Of Kluck that is on that table next to your throne!"
Swyparooski - "What Golden Chicken Of Kluck? I see no Golden Chicken Of Kluck!"
Gary - "It's right there on that table next to you, now, hand it over, you, you bad guy!"
It's exactly 3:30 in the afternoon!
Swyparooski - "Seriously, my old friend, I'd hand it over if I could see it, but, alas, I have no idea what you're talking about!"
Gary - "You're stalling, you monster! You know that it will soon be 3:37 and the Golden Chicken will come back to life and start laying platinum eggs, which will make it next to impossible to catch!"
Swyparooski "Ha ha ha ha ha ha! Correct, Sherlock! You are now facing defeat in the face, you little twerp! It's 3:37 and LOOK, the Golden Chicken Of Kluck is ALIVE, it's ALIVE I tell you!!!"
This is when all heck breaks lose, and the Golden Chicken begins clucking wildly, running all around the chamber, flying a bit, and laying platinum eggs by the hundreds!!
Swyparooski laughs that irritating, echoing, evil laugh...
Swyparooski - "Ha haaaa ha haaaa haaaaa! You will never catch me, or the Golden Chicken Of Kluck now, you miserable little Glirkazoid lackey!"
All of a sudden the Fab Five, minus Gary, rush in, corral the Golden Chicken Of Kluck, gather all of the platinum eggs, and then Rhymesauce, Big Gaz and Gounderus take the chicken and eggs back to the Silver Sausage, where for the remaining 23 hours, they can beam the Golden Chicken and all of the platinum eggs she lays, to the Museum Of Chicken Artifacts on Glirka!
Swyparooski - "Sooo, what are you two gonna do to me, huh? Torture me? Emulsificate me? Cut me into little pieces, and feed meto the teridacktalls...teradaktles...I never could spell pterodactyls!"
Rosie - "No, Swyparooski! We realize you have kleptomania, and will send you to Happy Stars Mental Health Facility to find your inner, honest self."
Swyparooski - "The hell you will!"
In an instant, Swyparooski whips out his concealed carry emulsificator and takes a shot at sweet Rosie!
Rosie leans away from the blast (like in The Matrix movie)
Gary - "Where are the rest of the Fab Five, Rosie?"
Rosie - "They took the treasured Golden Chicken Of Kluck and platinum eggs back to the Silver Sausage to send it all back to Glirka, to the..."
Gary - "They WHAT!!! Rosie!!! They are a million light years away from us by now! How could we be so dumb to let them take all the precious loot away from..."
Rosie - "Shut up, dufus! I'm getting a message! (Rosie is responding to her message) Uh, huh. Yes. Got it. Thank you!"
Gary - "Was that our so-called friends, gloating over their ill gotten gains?!!"
Rosie - "No, actually it was the Museum Of Chicken Artifacts on Glirka, thanking us for sending back the Golden Chicken Of Kluck and platinum eggs, that, by the way, are still being beamed there as we speak!"
Gary - "Well, those sons of biscuit eaters! I underestimated them and falsely accused them of being dishonest. I guess they have high standards, the same as you and me, Rosie!"
Rosie - "What's in that gunny sack, behind your back, Gary?"
Gary - "I don't see a gunny sack! You must be imaginating things, Rosie."
Rosie - (Talking to the Chicken Museum on her communicator) "Yeah, we overlooked a few platinum eggs, and will be sending them to you as soon as we get back on the Silver Sausage!"
Gary - "I just wanted to help the poor, and maybe spruce up the Silver Sausage a bit, take us on a needed vacation to Planet Mow-wee, buy you some gifts, for sure, send something to my destitute brother in law..."
Rosie - "Yeah, riiiiight!"
THE END
