THOUGHTFUL THURSDAY

I feel marvelous, simply marvelous, and honored, loved, and special, like a celebrity!

Why? You axe so dumbfoundedly!

I just found out the government is tracking my EVERY move!! How awesome is that?!

Nobody ever tracked my every move!! This is so great!!

I hear-tell they're monitoring my phone calls, Facebook activity, YouTube videos, how many toms I brush my teeth, walk my dog, Google something, and fart.

I feel like Angelina Jolie being relentlessly followed by the hungry paparazzi for just one glimpse up her mini-cooper! 

What's so cool is I'll be dead before I know it, and who else cared about me enough to make a record of every single little thing I do!

Not YOU! 

Now, anybody can go to my permanent government records after I'm deader than a doorknob, and find out how many toms I shi...shined my shoes!

What does Tom have to do with this, huh?!

What is everybody complaining about, don't most of us detail all of our life events, emotions, hopes, dreams, loves, hates, and what we ate for breakfast on Facebook, anyway?!!

Sure we do!!

I finally feel like I'm impotent, because our dear government has taken the time to make sure my legacy will be remembered by future generations of creatures that will one day conquer this place we love to call earth at this moment in tom!

Tom? TOM? Stop all the TOM crap immediately, before I go NUTS!!

GOOD GRIEF!!