Friday, July 5, 2013

Bug Fan I Am!

Fan Friday


I am a big fan of bugs!

I think my favorite is the little "pill bug." 
Armadillium -Vulgare

I called them armadillo bugs when I was a kid...
because I thought they looked like armadillos. 

I loved playing with them, because they would roll up into a little ball, as a defense mechanism, when I messed with them, and I could roll them around.

I never hurt them. They were WAY too cool, and cute! 

I was both terrified and fascinated by the Praying Mantis bug when I was a tot. (I guess I still am, a bit)
They look like the "Alien" creature in the movie "Alien."

They can swivel their horrible head around, catch an unsuspecting insect, and eat him, raw! Ewwww!

Praying Manticus-Grossicus

I also liked the fact that my name sounded a lot like Mantis! Mantis...Maness...Mantis...Maness...See?

The St. Louis Cardinal's baseball pitcher with the same exact spelling of his last name, pronounces it wrong! He pronounces it May-ness, when it should be pronounced Man-ness, man, man, man...not may...may...may! The silly goose!

I lost my train of thought. Maybe I just got off track. 


Uh, let's see, BUGS...that's the ticket, BUGS!

I'm not saying I love cockroaches, but I respect and admire them.

I guess they've been around for about a billion years, give or take a few million, and scientists say they would probably survive a nuclear attack! 



That's pretty tough!

I need to tell you my favorite, and most uncomfortable cockroach story!

I was an Orkin Man for a while.

Now you're probably thinking, how could you love bugs and be an Orkin Man? Hmm?

I needed the money!

Anyway, we went into a food establishment in the middle of the night to "fog" the place for cockroaches.

What food establishment?

I'm not gonna tell you, but it's initials rhyme with Jay-Teff-B. 

So, we put on our gas masks, turn on the fogger in the kitchen area, and watch what happens.

Warning this next part may be too terrifying for children and buggaphobes, so be forewarned to the maximum degree!

After about 10 minutes we begin to see a couple of "German cockroaches"...



 (you know, with those little German helmets that had the spike on top...just kidding) 

They slowly start crawling out from cracks and crevices all over the kitchen.

They creep out from under boxes, from behind the baseboard, from cracks in the floor, the spaces between the ovens and cabinets.

First one, then two, ten, twenty, 100, 500...from floor level, and then they begin crawling up the walls... by the hundreds!

This was starting to get a little unsettling, but it was not totally horrifying until they started creeping across the ceiling, and then dropping down on US!!

We had on our jump suits, gas masks, helmets (not the ones with the spikes), but it was still frightening to think some of them might be crawling down the back of my neck!! EWWWW!

I took one of the longest showers I've ever taken, after that unforgettable, traumatic experience!!

I hope this story didn't bug you!