No Mo Snow - Brief Follow Up

Okay, gang! Yesterday I was opining, uh, maybe whining about if God would help me do the snow covered driveway.

What miracle would he use, so I didn't have to break my weak back shoveling. 

When did I get my weak back, you ask? Oh, about a week back! 

  Did He wake me up in Phoenix? No. 

Did He send those two angels again?  No.

Did He change the forecast? No. 

Did He give me Herculean or Sampson-like strength? No.

Then wah happen'? 

God blessed me with, Donna!

She came out and did half of the work, even though she's a girl! 

Being very olde school, I would NEVER let a girl do half my work, but God moved my heart into making an exception in my advanced years of olde age, and she did a GREAT JOB!!!

That's cool and everything, but mowing is O.U.T.! Mowing is a man's work...at least it was in 1955, where most of my brain remains. 

No Mo Snow!! 

There are a few indivisibles that love snow! (Indivisibles?) Like my misguided friend, Terri!  Lol!

 Anywho, most of us either hate it, or grudgingly tolerate the "cold, white death," as I prefer to call it. 

This morning the weather gods are calling for 6 to nine inches of the CWD!!! 

Last tom (Tom who?), two total strangers cleared our driveway for us, but I cannot expect God to bless us again like that! That would be expecting way too much!!

God has a LOT more pressing circumstances than our stupid driveway! 

However, it won't hurt to pray about it. Maybe the snow prediction will be in error. Instead of 6 to 9 inches, it will be only 1 to 2 inches. I can handle that!

Maybe the snow will miss us all together! Or maybe I'm only dreaming of the snowstorm and when I wake up I'm actually living in Phoenix Arizona, and it's 85 degrees!

Now, my back surgery is about healed, so if worst comes to worst, I can PUSH the snow off the drive, but not LIFT the snow off the drive and re-traumatize my sensitive wittle back. 

Wait a sec! Maybe God will strengthen my sensitive wittle back, like he did with Hercules, or was that Sampson...either way, I'll be made more powerful and oblivious to pain, so as to conquer the "cold, white death!

Through God, all things are possible, right?

Okay, then here's the plan, I'll sit here and pray, and wait for those two "angels" to return and do our driveway, or for the prediction to be in error, or to wake up in Arizona, or for God to turn me into a Hercules or Sampson!!

See, I'm full of....options!! 

 

The First Thing To Go Is...I Forgot! 

So many readers, so little brain power to write brilliant blogs with a boisterous, but benevolent buffet of bull! 

Hi! Just funnin' wit ya, folks! When it comes to brain power...I'm full of it! 

Only problem is I do NOT remember important things like doctor appointments, if I took my pills, special birthdays, where I left my car and things like that! 

However, I remember silly, nonsense things, like names of movie stars from the 1930's, cartoon characters of the 1950's, how to recite the Crest toothpaste ad from the 1960's, John Wayne's real name, Roy Roger's real name, the name of Tonto's horse and totally trivial things like that! 

It's okay for playing a good game of Trivial Pursuit, but who does that anymore! (By the way, my sister Dee-Dee is way better than me)

Dee-Dee is right behind me, in foreground.
See how smart she looks!

If I remembered REAL stuff in the same way I remember ridiculous stuff, I'd be graduated from M.I.T.! The only M.I.T. I'll ever graduate from is Monsters Inc. Training school! 

What do you mean, you don't believe I can remember all that bizarre stuff from years past? 

Well, I'd do it, but you'd only think I googled the answers, right? 

Let's just say, Leonard Slye, and be done with it! 

It's all illustrated by my last visit to the doc. I told him that I've been having trouble remembering things. He said, "how long have you had this problem," and I said, "what problem!"

I'm here all week folks! Try the boisterous buffet!

Out  Of  This World Wednesday

We join our great, Glirkazoid friends, Gary and Rosie, as they await instructions from the High Leader, since they've decided to return to cosmic crime fighting, out of sheer boredom.  

Gary - "Chihuahua, Rosie, I can hardly wait until the High Leader communicates with us and reveals our new mission! I've got dat ole adventure seeking blood, bubbling in my veins, girl!"

Rosie - "Maybe those Tyrillian Tacos you ate last night has something to do with your bubbling blood, buddy."

Gary - "Possibly, but aren't you excited about getting back to evil creature crushing, menacing, mutant  monster mauling, and saving pitiful planets in peril?!!"

Rosie - "Sure I am, my gruesome, Glirkazoid, little giant, but we are gonna be a bit rusty from vacationing for so long, and you know that even the slightest misstep and we become a monster's meal!"

Mascot of Canton High School
The Little Giants

Gary - "I don't know about you, Rosie Posey, but I haven't lost a step. I'm as agile as a Loopoozirillian Lizard, running through the Vines Of Vertuum!"

Rosie - "Okay? Uh, why don't we have a pre-mission training excercise to see if we are still in tip top shape for dueling Dzarfulliam Dinos and such."

Gary - "Great idea, my Glirkazoidian genius! Let's run the infamous, terrible, tropical course, to see what we can do! I'll race you there, Rosie!!!"

6 spaze hours later we see Rosie waiting at the starting point of the tropical course, and Gary is FINALLY getting there, huffing and puffing like a Capultizzal Cat in pursuit of a pluggle mouse!"

This Capultizzal Cat is cheating.

Rosie - "Hey, slow poke, I've been waiting here for 5.9 spaze hours, what took you so long?"

Gary - "I, whoo, whoo (gasping for air), guess, whoo, whoo, I'm not, whoo, whoo, as in shape, whoo whoo, as I thought, whoo, whoo!!"

At that precise moment, someone communicates with our Glirkazoid guy and gal through their little communicator contraptions! 

Caller - "Hello! Has your spazeship warranty expired? It's important that you make sure you...

Gary and Rosie both cut the call off!

Gary - "Gee willikers, those calls drive me nuts, Rosie! Why don't they go out and find a real job, instead of..."

At that, another call buzzes in!

Gary - "Listen, moron, you are a big numbskull, calling us when we really... Oh, umm, hello High Leader! Uh, well, NO, I don't think you're a moron, it's a misunderstanding, I mean, NO, you're not a numbskull either, I ..."

High Leader - "Hey, dude and dudette, everything's cool. I'm just callin' you to tell you about the groovy, trippy trip, mission that you're gonna dig, brother and sister!" 

Rosie - (whispering to Gary), I think I know why they call him the HIGH leader."

What will be the exciting trippy trip the HIGH Leader gives to Gary and Rosie, that they will dig to the utmost, you right on readers?

Find out on the next...

Why Am I Doin' This?

If you've been a reader of the blog for many moons,you know why I do this blog,

 write songs, do little bits on the radio and pretty

 much make a fool of myself, don't you?

1. It keeps my A B Normal brain active.

2. It keeps me off the mean streets of Pekin, Illinois.

3. (Most important) In hopes I'll be discovered!

Yes, I know, I'm incredibly old and feeble, but I STILL have hopes that one day, some way, somehow, a music producer will hear one of my songs and like it, a comedy person will hear my wacky stuff on the radio and love it, or, well, out of all of those 74, 000 folks that have viewed my blog, SOMEBODY will appreciate SOMETHING, and SOMEHOW I'll make 10 million bucks!

Yes! It CAN HAPPEN, if I truly believe in Tinkerbell, click my heels together, or find a magic lamp to rub!

Picture this...Ray Liotta has come to Pekin to visit his wife's relatives. He inadvertently is listening to the Greg And Dan Radio Show and hears one of my comedy bits, or songs...especially this one...

And absolutely LOVES whatever he hears, calls me, hooks me up with a big music publisher, like Sony or something, and soon I'm rollin' in the dough!!

Follow the money folks! 

I know you think I do this weird stuff out of the goodness of my pea pickin' heart, but I'm really in it for the pazoozas!! 

Where was I? Oh, yeah, it's all about me again! 

Shoot fire, I promised I wouldn't make this blog about me, me, ME, anymore!

Okay, how's about this ..when I'm discovered, I'll give all of my faithful readers and YouTube friends a sum of cash!! Yeah, that's the ticket...moolah for everyone!!! 

How much? Well, more than I've ever given you before!! 

Have a wonderful Tuesday, especially this afternoon!