OUT OF THIS WORLD WEDNESDAY

CHRISTMAS EDITION 2015

While the brutal, despicable Ice-Us alien monsters 

get ready to invade the wonderful planet of Glirka, 

by freezing the inhabitants, while they joyfully

celebrate Glirkmas so innocently, our heroes are 

busy shopping for Glirkmas gifts for each udder!

Rosie - "Oh, my stars! There it is! The PERFECT gift 

for Gary!! This has to be the weirdest thing I could 

ever give him!"

20 stores away...

Gary - " I can't find ANYTHING for Rosie!! I HATE 

Glirkmas shopping!! Maybe I'll get hints from 

Rosie's Spazebook page."

A few hours later...

Gary - "Eureka! I found what Rosie wants by reading 

 her  Spazebook page!"

We now switch to the bridge of the Ice-Us warship, 

where the Ice-Us commander begins to speak in his 

gravelly, irritating voice, kind of like the way a 

cement mixer would sound.

Ice-Us Commander - (Laughs a mean, evil laugh) 

"Bwa ha ha, ha ha! Very soon, we will turn the 

planet of Glirka into a big round popsicle, and end 

all of their stupid Glirkmas celebrations 

FOREVER!!"

Ice-Us First Mate - "Why, Commander? I think 

Glirkmas is kind of cool!"

At that, the Commander commands security to 

totally disintegrates his First Mate!

Security

Ice-Us Commander - "Anyone else think Glirkmas is 

cool?!!"

No answer from anyone from the entire crew!!!

Let us now switch gears, and observe the

celebratory celebrations, preparation, and 

 perspiration of the Glirkazoids, as they 

prepare for the superglirkafragilistic day of 

Glirkmas!

Picture in your imaginatary mind, multi-colored 

lights, blinking and twinkling along the vertical 

boulevards of Glrka, while Glirkmas songs are sung

gleefully in the midst of the blue hazy mist that 

covers the planet on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and 

weekends!

Traditional songs like "Joy To The Worms," "We 

Three Kings Of Are We In Tar," Rude Alf The Red 

Nosed Alien," and "It Came Upon A Midlife Beer," 

fill the blue air!

The Salavation Army is ringing it's bells outside the 

Super Nova Markets to give away money to 

passersby, while the little tiny tots are waiting 

eagerly for Canta Slaus, to give him their precious 

lumps of coal that he hands out to the wealthy! 

We rejoin the horribly ugsville, Ice-Us Commander 

right now...

Ice-Us Commander - "Bwaa ha ha ha!! It is now 

Glirkmas day, and let's use the steroscope to focus 

in on our arch enemies, Gary and Rosie, as they 

carry on with their stupid Glirkmas giving...and then

 I will activate the "Deep Freeze" machine to cover 

the entire planet in 100 miles of frozen ice!!"

New First Mate - "I thought ALL ice was frozen, 

Commander!"

Ice- Us Commander - "SECURITY!"

The new first mate has met his fate for criticizing 

the Supreme Commander!

Now we see how the steroscope begins to zoom in 

on the planet of Glirka, through the clouds, trees, 

and all the way into the Silver Sausage spazeship, 

where Rosie and Gary abide...even when it's docked!

The hideous Ice-Us Commander is eager to watch 

 our heroes freeze their little antennas off, but first 

he wants to watch a bit of their ridiculously stupid

gift giving, before they go to a frozen tomb of 

DEATH!!

Rosie - (Hands Gary a package) "Merry Glirkmas my 

wonderful, faithful pard!"

Gary - " Is this one of those wacky, goofy gifts like 

you always give? (He begins to unwrap it) 

"Oh, my, Rosie! This is (Gary wipes a tear from his 

eye) the most wonderful gift imaginable, so 

thoughtful, sincere and priceless!

"The complete set of "The 3 Stooges" DVD's, The 

Directors Cut!!!

"This is the greatest gift EVER, my super friend!!!

"Thanks a billion toms!!!!"

Rosie - "You're very welcome, my sweet Gary! 

As the dirty, filthy Ice-Us Commander watches this 

on his steroscope, his beliefs are confirmed! 

Ice-Us Commander - "Aha!! The 3 Stooges?!! This 

proves that Glirkmas is just a bunch of silly 

nonsense that needs to be put out of existence! 

The mean, ugly commander looks into the 

steroscope again...

Gary - (Looks into Rosie's eyes and says) "I saw what 

you wrote on Spazebook, you said"..."This year if

I could have a miracle I'd give it to all my friends who 

have cancer or someone they love to be cured forever 

from this disease.

"Then I'd give everyone who is sad a smile for 

a Christmas gift. I'd wrap it up & send it to everyone 

with the slightest feeling of sadness.This is honestly 

what I would do because I care so much for all of you."

"So, Rosie, I traveled to the furthest region of the 

universe, to the planet of Zorba, where they have cures 

for everything, and in this little bottle...

is the cure for ANY disease! Please share it with 

your friends! There is enough in that little bottle for everyone!

"As for giving them happiness...You already have 

that gift, dear Rosie! For centuries you have given 

your friends smiles, and been there for them 

whenever they had the slightest feeling of sadness!"

No one knows why the Ice-Us Commander suddenly 

decided to spare the planet of Glirka, go back to his 

home planet, and never harm anyone again.

MERRY GLIRKMAS ONE AND ALL!!

OUT OF THIS WORLD WEDNESDAY

The stores of Glirka were really, really crowded with the ancient holiday of Glirkmas approaching swiftly, without any hesitation, like a reckless, abandon spazeship, bolting at a billion times light speed to a destination called nowhere!!!

Gary and Rosie had yet to buy gifts for each other, and it was always a competition between them as to who would buy whom the wackiest gift.

The stores of Glirka have a vast variety of Glirkmas gifts from all over the entire universe, that are so bizarre, fascinating, and weird that they are almost indescribable...so I won't try...but they look something like the objects below. 

Gary - ( Gary talks to himself as he meanders through the stores) "What, pray tell, shall I get for my fabulous friend, Rosie!

"She has everything under the suns (Glirka has two suns), and I need something SUPER RIDICULOUS to really impress and amaze her!"

Rosie - (Talking to herself as she wanders aimlessly through stores) "What can I get my best buddy, Gary, that will totally freak him out, and make ME the winner of our weirdest gift competition!

In the meantime, a gigantic force of wicked, grotesque aliens are planning to attack the beauteous planet of Glirka during the festive Glirkmas season when the Glirkazoids are preoccupied with singing, shopping, and getting high on candy canes! (Glirkazoids get super high from licking candy canes, for some inexplicable reason.) 

These horrible aliens are known by the name of Ice-Us, because they have a special weapon that covers their enemies in ice, totally immobilizing them, and leaving them to die in a frigid, frozen tomb!!

Back to our shoppers...

Gary - (Speaking to a sales assistant) "What in the universe is this thing?" (As he picks up some weird contraption)

Sales Assistant - "No touching, sir! That happens to be the hottest Glirkmas item on the planet! You must live under a rock to not know that!"

Gary - (Thinking to himself) "Why, you snobby bee itch! I'm out saving the universe, which includes your sorry arse, and don't have time to watch commercials on Glirkavision, and you're giving me this holier than thou routine, you poor excuse for a Qwertanian mud monster!!"

Gary actually says...    "Yes, I DO live under a rock, it's a bit uncomfortable, but it protects me from RUDE life forms, like you!"

Sales Assistant - "Well, I never!!"

Gary - "Maybe if you DID you wouldn't be so mean and nasty!"

I think Gary may have a difficult time getting the perfect gift for Rosie!

I wonder how Rosie is doing? 

Join us next week for OUT OF THIS WORLD WEDNESDAY, and more Glirkmas joy!!!