Nikki Submits Her Resignation 

What a total shock to hear about Nikki's sudden resignation!  It almost brought me to tears.

For so many years I've admired her for her talent and abilities beyond many others in her field. 

Millions of folks around the world will never forget her impact on the music world! 

Oh, wait...I was thinking Nicki Minaj...my bad!

The REAL Christopher Columbus Revealed

There are two schools of thought regarding the life and legend of Christopher Columbus.

1. A brave hero who was financed by Queen Isabella to sail three ships across the Atlantic Ocean and discover America.

2. A greedy businessman who never REALLY discovered America at all, but took the credit for it.

I know I didn't include details like, Leif Erickson, cannibal activities, diseases that wiped out millions of Native Americans, and other incidental atrocities... but we are searching for the total TRUTH...tootsie.

Our researchers have found that "Christopher Columbus" was actually born, Bernie Blatz, but later changed his name to Christopher Columbus, because it sounded much cooler. 

Can you imagine Americans celebrating Blatz day? No pazazz whatsoever! 

WHAT?!!

In addition, Bernie was not Italian at all, he had a German father and Mongolian mother, who both loved Lasagna, which led to the misconception that they were an Italian family. 

Of course, none of this matters, in light of the fact that American holidays are just an excuse to get off work, drink excessively, and argue over useless information from long past history, like the Cardinals/Red Sox World Series of 2004. 

Back to our riveting account!

Now, Bernie..er...uh...I mean, Christopher Columbus loved to gamble...big time!

As with ALL gamblers, he had to know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em, know when to walk away, know when to run...and he owed so many gambling debts he decided to RUN!!!

So with a little help from his gal friend, Izzy Bella, a local dance hall girl...he booked passage on a ship that was going to Liechtenstein...a simple 3 hour tour...a 3 hour tour...

The ship got blown off course, a bit, and ended up in almost America, which is close enough for historians and tellers of tales. 

Well, that's it! Ain't history great? 

Especially when we can make it up as we go along, like historians have done for eons upon eons.

What's an eon, you ask? 

e·on

ˈēən,ˈēˌän/

noun

1. an indefinite and very long period of time, often a period exaggerated for humorous or rhetorical effect.
2. 
   
3. Wasn't this fun?  Let's do this again REAL SOON, but without all the hysterical stuff...I mean...historical stuff. 
4. 
   
5. Here is something I'll ALWAYS remember from my school days..."Columbus sailed the deep blue sea in fourteen hundred ninety three!" I hope this helps you youngsters out there.  

Art Appreciation 101

Vincent Willem van Gogh 

Danny Maness

I invite you to make a close examination of the artwork above.

Are you done already?

C'mon, go back and REALLY examinate both specimens very closely, like you were an art critique! 

Good! Now, which piece touched your soul to the deepest depth of your emotional dankness and deprivation? 

It does not matter that one artist is a Master and the other is a moron.

It matters not that the technique of van Gogh's, Starry Starry Night is flawless, whilst Danny Manesses, Bloggadocious 222 is raw and kindergartenish.

It's how much,YOU, as a free thinking, unbiased, independent individual are moved by the unique creation the artist has set before you for evaluation.

So, now is the time of decision...van Gogh's mishmash of swirly colors or Manesses, REAL, gutsy, desolate,thought provoking masterpiece? 

Leave comments in comment section below. If you can't find where to comment, hover your cursor over the comments section and it will magically appear...maybe.

Click on surprise link below, you will not be disappointed...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oxHnRfhDmrk

Observe with me now, the mysterious bump in the, so called,"green space," on the Peoria, Illinois riverfront. Discovered in 2018 by unsuspecting Caterpillar tractor operators, who have now since disappeared, with no trace. 
Scientists from around the globe have utilized state of the art technology to decipher the mystery beneath the surface of the pulsating mound, but to no avail. 

Any industrial type of diamond tipped drill, explosives, or even lasers have yet to penetrate into the unknown secrets of the indestructible mound.
Could it merely be a natural formation that  has a perfectly logical explanation, or a buried spaceship...the first of an OTHER WORLDLY ADVANCED FORCE, intent on the destruction of the earth, enslavement of mankind, and turning us into shish kabob?!! 

Renowned astrophysicist, Elroy Jetson,  has theorized that this "bump"could be an interdimensional, transitional, uni-directional,  quark of gargantuan proportions, that is basically harmless if we just stop messin' wit it! 

In conclusion, we are told not to worry about things that go bump in the night, but what about a "bump" in the day? 

We Are NEVER Too Old For Cartoons

I'm very, very ancient and decrepit, but I STILL love cartoons. 

Why, you ask so curiously? 


Well, uh...it's because cartoons can do ANYTHING!

Whatever the cartoon creators imagine, can be exactly duplicated and put in to animated magic, that goes into our brains so deeply that we STILL remember them vividly into our "old coot" years. 

Don't believe me? 

Okay, I'll prove it!

1. Name the 7 Dwarfs. 
See, you knew all of them...except maybe Doc! 

2. Pixie and _______.
No, not Jinx! Dixie is the answer...uh...well...Jinx is also kind of right. 

3. What was the name of Tom Terrific's dog?
Incorrect...it was NOT Mighty Joe Young, but Mighty______
Mighty Mouse is NOT a dog! Mighty Manfred, The Wonder Dog, man! 




 








4. Who was Popeye's foe, Bluto or Brutus? 


Hint: Trick question. 
Both!  First Bluto and then Brutus, due to a copyright thing or something. 






                                                                          
Bluto  
                                                         Brutus         

So...as you can clearly see, I was wrong about vividly remembering cartoons in our "old fart" years. 

On the other hand, I still enjoy watching them olde cartoons, and they SEEM new, because my memory is totally "hammered" from too much cartoon watching...or some other reason. 

I can't believe how old I am!!! 

See the olde school below, with the olde cars parked in front, that look like they came out of a James Cagney/Edward G. Robinson movie, and the little kids dressed like the Lil' Rascals? 

That was MY school!!!

Clinton-Peabody Elementary School
                      Circa 1950                   

I was born in 1950, so I didn't attend Clinton Peabody until Circa 1955 for Kinny-Garden. At least that's what I called it. 

The only reason I included this photo of Clinton-Peabody is to illustrate just how olde I am. 

Now, totally forget about me being olde and decrepit, and focus in on ants. 

I was watching the ants out on my patio this morning and noticed how fast they travel! I was thinking to myself, Danny, I believe these ants travel faster than cars, proportionately. So I looked it up and found...

• Assume a human is 6 feet tall. At the same rate as the ant, the human would cover 787 times its size, or 4,723 feet per minute.

• Put that in a unit most people (including me) could recognize, and that's 53.6 miles per hour.

Haaa! You NEVER EVEN DREAMED you would learn anything from reading this ridiculous blob..I mean, blog..did ya?!!

Especially from an olde dude like me!!!



Please stop bringing age into the argument..wouldya? 

Where was I? 

Oh yeah, the genius, Galileo who lived to the ripe old age of 77 was an Italian polymath. Known for his work as astronomer, physicist, engineer, philosopher, and mathematician, Galileo has been called the "father of observational astronomy", the "father of modern physics", the "father of the scientific method", and even the "father of science!"

Not bad for an olde guy. right?! 

Of course, we are not discussing the ignorance of youth, compared to the wisdom and experience of the elderly, are we? 

Remember when Ronald Reagan said this in a debate with Walter Mondale...of course you don't...you're too young...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kygB-PA2ibs

Click on the above link to hear what Ronald Reagan said.

Latvian Dance Festival Rocks

Here you see me in Latvia...at the Latvian Dance Festival, where students from all over this Baltic country compete for the Trophy Of Goats and Chickens, that has been handed down to the winners since ancient times. I am wearing the traditional Latvian longhat, that also doubles as a parachute in the cliff jumping "Dance Of The Angels."

It is an honor and a privilege for the young students to participate in the dance festival, even though they really have no choice in the matter. An olde Latvian proverb reads like this..."Your heart may tell you not to dance, but you better dance anyway, or suffer the curse of the Fatal Foot Fungus!"

Actual photo of Fatal Foot Fungus

The only way I can describe this lovely Latvian Dance Festival, with Latvian musicians playing home made wooden flutes and stringed instruments, and wearing a multitude of colorful costumes is by including these recent pictures....

Wow! I'm so happy that you were able to travel with me to the Latvian Dance Festival...all be it vicariously! 
Wasn't it fun NOT to hear about Donald Trump, Brett Kavanaugh , Christine Blazzey Ford, and the "Russian collusion" for a change?

If you want to keep not hearing about these things, come on over to my blog, where nonsense is nonsensical, sarcasm is sarcastic, and wit is witless! 
Disclaimer: Not any or all of this blog has any association with the C.I.A., extraterrestrials, Monty Python, the death of Marvin Hamlisch, and, above all else...the truth. 

     BRETT KAVANAUGH IS MUCH WORSE THAN  YOU  THINK!!!!! 

FACTS YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT BRETT KAVANAUGH....

1. He was not a good baby! He cried a lot and had messy diapers!!

2. As a little boy he said a bad word...poop!! 

3. When he was 9 years old he "accidentally" wandered into a Victoria's Secret store!!

How can any decent American ever want this degenerate psychopath to be on the Supreme Court where he might even "hit on" Ruth Bader Ginsburg!!