Friday, February 28, 2020

Parking Lot Pandemonium



pan·de·mo·ni·um
/ˌpandəˈmōnēəm/
noun
  1. wild and noisy disorder or confusion; uproar.
    "pandemonium broke out"
    Similar:
    bedlam
    chaos
    mayhem
    uproar
    madness
    havoc  turmoil

Folks who drive okay on the roads will completely
 throw out ALL the rules when driving in a parking lot!



You know it and I know it!



No speed limit exists in a parking lot, so 60 mph is cool,
RIGHT? 



The directional arrows are not REAL, because they 
were painted on by the parking lot makers, not the
 state!



The stop signs are not OFFICIAL stop signs! They are 
smaller and shorter than authentic stop signs, so 
ignoring them is okay!



It's all good to go in between cars, crossways, across the 
lanes at any indiscriminate point!



Taking up two parking spaces is permissible! Why? 
Because you deserve it!!



Cars have the right of way over grannies with little
 carts! We don't have time to wait on their slow butts!!



If we are driving a semi truck or big Silverado with a
 looong horse trailer, park across 12 spaces, instead of 
in an area that doesn't block any spaces in the lot! 
Why should you hafta walk  so far? You're an American 
citizen with inalienable rights, or an undocumented 
immigrant with the same exact rights, for some reason 
unbeknownst to me!



It's the perfect situation for an old coot like me who 
needs to sharpen my driving reflexes by avoiding 
cars darting ACROSS the lanes instead of following 
the arrows, watching for vehicles going the wrong
 direction of the arrows, looking for cars speeding 
through the stop signs at 60mph, and dodging grannies
who have been propelled through the air by unrelenting 
pick up trucks!



Call me an old school fool (not really), 
but I take pride in following the 
arrows, driving at reduced speeds, watching 
for grannies, parking in ONE space, and stopping at 
stop signs in parking lots, to prevent death 
and dismemberment. 



How's about you, Boogaloo?



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