♫♪MADNESS MUSIC MONDAYS♪♫♪

My featured song today is "The Sweet Hot Hoochiecoo" by Danny Maness.

Over the years there has been a significant amount of confusion over this song, and I'm here to make things worse.

First of all, there are many variations of the spelling of "hoochiecoo." 

Allow me to show you some examples:

Rock and Roll Hoochie Koo

Rock and Roll Hoo Chee Coo

Although they are singing "Honky Tonk Woman!"

Hoochy Coochy, another interesting spelling.

A bunch of dirty minded dudes have mistakenly thought that my song is about doin' the "nasty," but they are so far from the truth.

The "Sweet Hot Hoochiecoo" is a DANCE that has it's roots in the wildly popular "Hoochie Coochie" belly dance from days gone by.

HOOCHIE COOCHIE

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

The Hoochie Coochie was a sexually provocative belly dance that originated 

at the Philadelphia Centennial Exhibition in 1876. It became wildly popular during 

and after the Chicago World's Fair in 1893.

I'll provide the lyrics to my classic song,

and you can be the judge of whether it's sexually 

provocative or a simple dance song, okay? 

The Sweet Hot Hoochiecoo

by me.

Tom in Tennessee is bored,
Friday night fire up the Ford,
Grab Jolene head for the show,
Runs outta gas, he whispers low,
When there's nothin' to do,
Do the Sweet Hot Hoochiecoo.


You do the Sweet Hot Hoochiecoo,

You do the Sweet Hot Hoochiecoo,
Do the Sweet Hot Hoochiecoo,
Do the Sweet Hot Hoochiecoo,
When there's nothin' to do,

Do the Sweet Hot Hoochiecoo.

Kansas Prairie, Bill and Mary,

Got two kids named Jill and Larry,

Put them babies in their beds,

Now William smiles when Mary says,

When there's nothin' to do,

Do the Sweet Hot Hoochiecoo.

You do the Sweet Hot Hoochiecoo,

You do the Sweet Hot Hoochiecoo,
Do the Sweet Hot Hoochiecoo,
Do the Sweet Hot Hoochiecoo,
When there's nothin' to do,

Do the Sweet Hot Hoochiecoo.

Doin' it in Austin, over in St. Lou,

Even up in Boston, they do the Hoochiecoo,

All the way to Fargo, south to Tupelo,

Way down in Key Largo, everywhere you go,

When there's nothin' to do,

Do the Sweet Hot Hoochiecoo.

Sam and Sadie long retired,

Neath the blue skies of Fort Myers,

Sittin' 'round is not their way,

From time to time you'll hear 'em say,

When there's nothin' to do,

Do the Sweet Hot Hoochiecoo

You do the Sweet Hot Hoochiecoo,

You do the Sweet Hot Hoochiecoo,
Do the Sweet Hot Hoochiecoo,
Do the Sweet Hot Hoochiecoo,
When there's nothin' to do,

Do the Sweet Hot Hoochiecoo.

Now, if you find tom, watch the video below,

and see if you still have the same opinion.

(On the other hand, don't even worry about 

finding Tom, he's a bad dog)

ST. LOUIS SUNDAYS

CIRCA 1959

We lived on the flight path of the planes landing at St. Louis Lambert International Airport,  although I don't think it had such a long name back then. 

We just called it Lambert Field.

The jets coming in over our house were so cockadoodie loud that we had to stop our conversations in mid sentence and start up again after the plane went over! 

 For example: The Cardinals sure have a great..roooooAAAAAARRRRRRRR..baseball team this year. 

My dad would look up at the jets going over and yell, "Pull up you fool, you'll kill us all!!" 

As kids, we would love to walk over to the airport and watch the rich people getting on and off the jet liners.

That's when they rolled the steps up to the door of the plane, and folks had to walk a short distance across the landing field to the terminal.

We could walk all over the place...any where we wanted...no security, no scanners, no taking our shoes off for inspection, no cameras watching us, no nuttin' honey!!

They even had a platform area with telescopes, where we could put in a dime and watch the planes coming in from a distance...for about 10 seconds...then we had to put in another dime.

Here is yet another interesting piece of history I'll share with you.

The McDonnell Douglas Corporation was located right next to Lambert Airport http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/McDonnell_Douglas 

They built and TESTED military jets every day, and there were no laws against them breaking the sound barrier over our house at that time in history.

The first time it happened, we thought a semi-tractor trailer truck, loaded with bricks, had plowed into the side of our house!

The house shook, and the BOOM was deafening!! 

Between the "sonic booms" and the jets flying at tree top level over our house, it's a wonder I can even hear at 162 years of age! (Just seeing if you're payin' attention.)

 The first time I ever got to go to Lambert Field and fly on a plane was in 1969, when the Army, so graciously, paid all my expenses to Seattle, Washington for basic training at Ft. Lewis.

It was still really cool looking down and seeing all the shapes, patterns, squiggly lines, and crop circles on the ground.

I don't care to fly now.

Back then, everybody was treated like kings and queens, the stewardesses all looked like Miss America contestants, the meals were pretty good, you didn't have to pay extra for your luggage, or take off your shoes, or go through a life shortening scanner, or come to the airport 2 hours early...

Nowadays, I'd rather walk.

SSSSSURREAL SATURDAYSSURREAL SATURDAYSSUSURREAL SURREAL SATURDAYSSATURDAYSRREAL SATURDAYS

Surreal Saturdays are designed to remind us that everything that we believe is real, is most likely SURreal, and the other way around.

Take a look at our universe, go ahead, I'll wait until you're done.

Ha! Don't you get the joke?

How ya ever gonna see the entire universe when galaxies are billions of light years away from each other, and we are, like, a billion light years away from the nearest galaxy?!!

http://www.atlasoftheuniverse.com/stardist.htm

I know this! I watch the H2 channel!

So, when you think about it, the universe is way more surreal than real. Plus, it's COLORS are super surreal, and that's impotent! (Like I've been since my operation)

Now class, how many think Robin Williams is real?

Anybody? Anybody?

Well, of course we don't! We view him as surreal, and maybe from another planet.

However, he has to be real, because he was on TMZ!

http://www.tmz.com/2008/02/26/robin-williams-a-family-affair/

Let's look at another example, children.

We all believe Zombies are real, right? If they weren't real, there wouldn't be so many TV shows and movies about them, correct?

In addition, we wouldn't be storing up guns, ammunition, bombs, Zombie repellent, and stuff like that for the zombie apocalypse, would we?

Well, here's a clue for you. 

Zombies are way more surreal than they are real!

Use your common sense, man! 

Have you ever walked into a White Castle hamburger joint, and see a bunch of Zombies in there?

https://www.facebook.com/pages/Beware-Of-White-Castle-Zombies/263229023716440

Okay, bad example.

How about a rock festival? Uh, that's even worse.

Family reunion?  Class reunion?

Family reunion? 

 Class reunion?
 Class reunion?
Class reunion?       Starbucks?

Class reunion?Family reunion?  Starbucks? 

Well, maybe I was wrong about zombies not being real, but how about Lady Gaga...

FAN FRIDAYS FAN FRIDAYS FAN FRIDAYS

THE LONE RANGER

The Lone Ranger was noted for his unusually strong 

moral and ethical code. He used his silver bullets to 

disarm opponents, not to kill. The radio and early TV 

series were careful to keep the Ranger's abilities 

somewhat plausible...yes, he could outdraw any single 

opponent,  but had to be more clever to deal with 

multiple opponents, and although the close relationship 

with his faithful Indian companion (Tonto) has raised 

eyebrows, the Lone Ranger always treated his friend 

with the deepest respect and as an equal partner.

Jay Silverheels and Clayton Moore

The Lone Ranger is on my top 10 list of someone who greatly influenced my life! (Even though I fell FAR short of his standards!)

No, not Clayton Moore, but the character he played, on and off the T. V. screen.

He was honest, caring, clean, never killed anyone that I can remember, but above all, he was HUMBLE!

My favorite part was at the end of the show, and the Lone Ranger had already "split the scene," as we used to say in the 50'S, and he had left a silver bullet to let the townsfolk know who he really was...It went something like this:

Townsfolk dude: "That masked man saved us all, and didn't even let us thank him!"

A different townsfolk dude: "Who was that masked man?"

Then, still another townsfolk dude picks up a silver bullet that the "masked man"  left on the table, and says, "Why, that was the Lone Ranger!!" 

THEN It flashes to the coolest scene of the Lone Ranger on his magnificent horse Silver!

Silver is rearing up on his hind legs, and the Lone Ranger declares, " Hi O Silver, AWAY!!!"

Think about it, the "ranger" is saving people all over the Old West, never gets his ranger outfit dirty, loves his Indian friend  Tonto like a brother, never takes advantage of women by kissing them, has an intimate relationship with his horse, and STILL is so humble, he wears a mask to hide his identity, and never even tells people his name, because he doesn't want to brag about himself.

( I can't think of any other reason he'd want to hide his identity, can you?)

 I always thought it was so cool when he'd shoot the gun out of the "bad guys" hand, and the "bad guy" would scrunch his face up in pain, and shake his hand like he hit it with a hammer.

The Lone Ranger had to do things like that, because this was Saturday morning kids time, and no blood and guts were allowed in this time slot.

As a kid, I really did try to emulate the Lone Ranger's qualities, but MAN, I screwed it up royally!

I was always trying to kiss girls, I was perpetually dirty, I didn't have ANY Indian friends, I was afraid of horses (because one had bit me on that little roll of fat I had around my tummy at a pony ride thing, and it hurt like crazy!!), and I loved attention!!

I DID have some silver bullets (provided by the Mattel Toy Company) that went into my official Lone Ranger gun, but even  I knew it was just silver (lead) paint on plastic.

Clayton Moore was so dedicated to his role as the Lone Ranger, that he made personal appearances as the masked man (without permission) for many years after the series had ended, even to the point where the legal owners to the rights of the show banned him from wearing the mask in public, but later on the ban was lifted, THANK GOD!!

http://articles.latimes.com/1985-01-15/news/mn-7324_1_clayton-moore

If you never watched The Lone Ranger you probably think this blog post is silly, but for those of you who grew up watching this show know exactly what I'm talking about, and can still hear the William Tell Overture, and the heart stirring words at the opening of the show:

THOUGHTFUL THURSDAYS

Whenever I remember, I write "Thoughtful Thursdays" in soothing, restful colors, because this is our day to mellow out, take the chill pill, put all of our troubles and worries in a blue balloon, and let them float, float, way up high, and POP, they're gone.

The perfect day for listening to the Moody Blues, the magical group that I was privileged to see, live, in concert, 3 times!

I discovered that the Moody Blues are actually aliens from a far more beautiful, and peaceful world than we inhabit, and their gorgeous, hypnotic music is to help us see what a dirty, crappy world we live in, by comparison. 

Click on this video, close your tired eyes, put your feet up, take a deep breath, and begin to listen to the silver strains of  the mellowest band of all tom!!

Did you listen to it?


Why not?

Yeah, these are busy times.

Okay, but you remember it, right?

Here is the true meaning: 

The Knights in White Satin are, in truth, the members of the Moody Blues from the planet 
Hayward, who are not really wearing white satin, but when they enter the atmosphere of the earth they begin to emit a glowing light that makes it look like they're wearing white satin, however, they can cloak those shining rays so earth dudes can't see them.

The song goes on to say, they are "never reaching the end," which shows that their mission of  humiliating all the creatures of all the planets in the universe will continue forever.

"Letters I've written, never meaning to send" means they have written warning messages to all the tiny, insignificant beings throughout the galaxies, to tell them they will eventually be destroyed in an agonizingly painful  display of fire and plague, but didn't ever really intend to send them out, because they figure we are better off not knowing.

Then they sing, "Beauty I've  always missed , with these eyes before, just what the truth is, I can't say anymore"...Which means: They are allowed to gather all the beautiful people they find, and take them back to  paradisaic,  Hayward, but they haven't found too many so far, and after watching Fox News, reality shows, and politicians, they have NO IDEA what the truth is anymore! 

Now here is the clincher! 

Then they sing, "But I love you, yes I love you, Oh, how I love yoooouoooh!"

What up wit dat? 

Well, on Hayward, the word love means, EAT!

                                  If you don't have tom to watch the whole clip, watch it yourself from 3:00.          


Yes, they will use the "beautiful" among us, as a source of food, before our planet becomes a burned out cinder, but look on the bright side...Oh, yeah, there is no bright side!