BLOGGADOCIOUS 222

by Danny Maness

Sunday and me used to sing together in sweet harmony...or is it Sunday and I that went together like ice cream and apple pie...oh, I don't know why, but it's not a lie!

Lately, Sunday's feel just the same as the other days all filled with pain, especially when it rains, and Benji Boo calls out my name, to take him for walk.

Even Benji has been very sick, each night we watch him like a hawk, he had 13 seizures the other night, is that medicine working, or is that just talk?!

I guess that since I'm retired, Sundays mean far less, this used to be the only day when I felt free from stress, but now since every day looks like the one before, Sundays aren't the special thrill to this guy, anymore.

The problem could be I worry too much, about bills, and health, and things, as a child I worried not about all that living brings, the food was on the table, the health was in my bones, I had a roof up over my head, and I never felt alone.

Oh, the things that I would change, if I could do it over again, I'd use my brain, and be more kind to family and friends. 

Seriously, does it matter? If I altered the "Great Plan",

I know deep down that I would end up right here where I am!

BLOGGADOCIOUS 222

MY NEW BLOG

What is life without new beginnings, fresh starts, second chances, and blessed forgiveness?

Nuthin', right?

Remember how I promised I'd never post my blog on Fazebook again, and how surprised you are to be reading this blog on Fazebook, and think I'm a big fat liar?

Well, this is not that blog! This is my NEW blog! The blog I told you I'd never put on Fazebook again, was my old "My Life Is Only For Laughs," blog, whereas, this is my new, Bloggadocious 222 blog! 

A moment with Angels is better than money...

Angels are adorable, happy and funny...

They will always stick in my memory...

To set my spirit soaring free...

Whenever I need peace and harmony...

 For the times I ask, "To be or not to be."

OUT OF THIS WORLD WEDNESDAY

 

Spiraling through a sea of amazing, ever changing colors, while feeling the static pin pricks from the ion residue, was a normal part of time travel. Gary was used to this, but he didn't expect such a bumpy landing back on his home planet of Glirka! Of course, since Gary doesn't wear clothes, it caused a few scrapes and bruises on his little body!

Gary had just returned from the year 1950 in Earth years, when one of the unsung heroes of Earth was born, and humans all over their world celebrated "Danny Days!"

It just so happened that today was Gary's birthday, and he wondered if he would one day be honored like Danny!

Yellow Rose welcomes Gary back and has him enter the de-ionization chamber without a word about his birthday.

Gary - (Talking to Y.R. from the chamber) "Wow, Yellow Rose, they sure had a fantastic BIRTHDAY celebration on Earth!"

Yellow Rose, looking at a magazine..."That's nice."

Gary - "I think it would be AWESOME to have people celebrate MY BIRTHDAY like that!"

Yellow Rose - (Not looking up from her magazine) "Uh huh."

Gary - "Is there something you might have forgotten, my faithful friend?"

Yellow Rose - "Gary! Oh, my gosh! I am so sorry, buddy! I forgot to take you out of the de-ionization chamber in time! Now you're gonna be a bit wrinkled the rest of the day!

Gary - (Dejectedly stepping out of the chamber) "That's okay Y.R. I'll go home and press myself."

As Gary walks through the Space Community Compound, he bumps into a bunch of his old friends and partners who have known him for most of his 222,000 parsecs of life.

Not one of them remembered his birthday!

Gary starts mumbling to himself as he walks home looking down at the ground..."Well, ain't this a crappy birthday...I thought my friends loved me...maybe I ticked them all off without knowing it...it almost makes me want to cry, but I'm too tough to cry...I'm a legendary hero...legendary heroes don't cry.........

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!

Gary reaches his home and sadly opens the front door....

SURPRISE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yellow Rose had organized the biggest surprise party for Gary that Glirka had ever seen! There were more than a thousand fellow Glirkazoids, and many creatures from various and diverse galaxies! 

Gary - "This is wonderful, Yellow Rose! I thought nobody cared about me."

Yellow Rose - "You are such a dumb head, Gary! Everybody loves you, and especially me!"

Gary - "Wha,wha..what did you just say? You LOVE me?"

Yellow Rose - "Of course!" Just like I love my grandpa."

Gary - "Oh, uh, yeah, that's what I thought you meant, Y.R."

Yellow Rose - (Raises her glass in a toast) "Happy Birthday my lifelong friend, and may your days prove to be long and prosperous!"

Gary felt the warm tingle of being loved!

JUST SAYIN' SATURDAY

Have you ever tried to tell someone how you feel about a mildly impotant subject (impotant?) and when they take an opposite view that is more profound than yours, you tell them, "Just sayin'.

Translated...I'm just using my First Amendment rights and telling you what I think...even if it's incorrect.

With this in mind, I'm introducing Just Sayin' Saturday to give myself the soul freeing opportunity to say whatever I want , no matter how wrong it is! HA!

Since I'm not posting my blog on Facebook anymore, I want to talk about all of the thankless, jealous, so-called friends that ignore almost everything I used to share there! Share there...I made a rhyme! Cool!!

I ALWAYS try to at least "like" and usually make a comment on my friends and families posts, even if it's something they've copied and pasted! I appreciate the message they are trying to convey. Most importantly, I want them to feel like I'm not ignoring them!

In my case, almost everything I post is original comedy or music. Some of the videos I post take me days to do, and I want to brighten the days of my family and friends, so I really don't get why 80% of the people I love skip over my stuff.

Maybe they just miss my posts, right? 

No way, because I test it out from time to time by posting very controversial things about trashing Obamacare, or mutilating the baby killers, or loving Glen Beck and Rush Limbaugh. 

EVERYBODY sees those posts! Take my worm for it! 

The beauty of this blog, now, is that none of the Facebookers see it anymore, and I can get this off my chest with absolutely no repercussions!

Of course, this does NOT apply to my wonderful wife, Donna, Cheryl Mim Yellow Rose Merritt, Kiel Villeneuve, Denise Sparkman Grant..who care enough to make me feel like I truly exist! 

All of you others, who don't care about my feelings can "fart up a rope!" Just sayin'!

OUT OF THIS WORLD WEDNESDAY

Last Wednesday we found our valiant adventurers in trouble with...why don't I just copy and paste what happened last week to save tom. (Tom would appreciate it!)

All of a sudden, our heroes find themselves surrounded by 100 angry Gluptillians, all decked out in their scary war stuff!

War paint on their creepy, six eyed faces, wearing yakmuk fur on their muscular, scarred bodies, swords, knives, hatchets, and cork screws hanging from their belts, and holding emusificator weapons in their extra large, grotesque, gnarly hands! 

Gary swang into action (if swang is actually a word) and began to use the ancient, Glirkazoid marshall art of keekyo bot, that the Gluptillians found very funny, with Gary swinging his little arms around, kicking into the air and yelling HI-YA! In fact, they all started laughing so hard, and rolling on the ground, Yellow Rose and Gary were able to easily escape!

Gary and Yellow Rose hide in the bushes. Gary is out of breath when he says, "Those...(breath)...dudes...(breath)...are lucky I...(breath)...let them off so easy! 

Yellow Rose - "Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha! Let them off so easy?! Gary! The Gluptillians are some of the mightiest, fiercest, warriors in the universe! Remember, we were sent here to stop them from their warring ways that they've embraced for millions of septons!!"

Gary - "Well, what were you gonna do, Yellow Rose, give them a flower?! Hmmmm?"

Yellow Rose - "Of course not (cough, cough), I was gonna (cough) talk to them (cough, cough) about..."

Gary - "Are you okay, Y.R.? 

Yellow Rose - I'm fine (cough) Gary, I ...

At this,Yellow Rose passes out! 

Gary - ROSIE! Wake up! What's wrong girl! Can you hear me?!

Yellow Rose is non-responsive, and Gary has no choice but to carry her out to the Gluptillians and beg for mercy! He knew the Gluptillians were all medical experts, due to the constant battle injuries they have had to deal with over eons of time. He went down on his knees and pleaded with them to help his faithful partner, Yellow Rose!

The leader of the Gluptillian dudes was known as Flesh Shredder, he spoke to Gary in an eerie, gravelly voice, and said, "Why should we help a puny, miserable Glirkazoid like her? She means nothing to us!"

Gary - "Yellow Rose is known throughout the entire universe ( except for here) as the kindest, sweetest, most compassionate, caring life form in existence! Remember when the Viagrans were about to destroy themselves, and some mysterious force saved the whole bunch of them?"

Flesh Shredder - Sure! That's on all the history files, and the Viagrans are second cousins to the Gluptillians!

Gary - "Well, that "mysterious force" that saved your cousins was my friend here, Yellow Rose!"

Flesh Shredder - "Do you expect us to believe that? We are not fools, green boy!"

Gary - "Look at what's around her neck." 

Flesh Shredder bends down and gently picks up the shiny medallion that is hanging on a chain around Yellow Rose's neck.

In total disbelief he whispers, "Why, this is the medallion of Vigros! This is the greatest honor the Viagrans can give to the bravest, wisest, most celebrated life form on their planet! What you are saying is true, tall eyes!!

Gary - "She is very, very sick! Would you PLEASE make her well? I don't know what the universe would do without her!"

Flesh Shredder - "Do you think she would be willing to help us end our wars if we restore her health?"

Gary - "Is a pig's butt pork?"

Flesh Shredder - "What?"

Gary - "I mean, SURE SHE WOULD!"

Flesh Shredder retrieves a small stone from the small man-purse on his belt. The stone begins to glow as he holds it over Y.R's body! All of a sudden, Yellow Rose opens her eyes, and groggily says, "Did you get the license number of that bus?"

Gary - "Yellow Rose! Yellow Rose! I'm so happy you're not sick anymore!" Now you need to bring peace to Glupterous so they don't kill us!"

Yellow Rose - "I'll get right on it, Gary. As soon as I "toss my cookies!" Bluurrpp!!

Well, well, well...happily, Yellow Rose used her extensive amount of charm and weaponry to bring peace to the Gluptillians, who were so grateful they awarded her the golden statue of Globus, and Gary was very proud of his faithful cohort, and Gary was very jealous!!

SWEET SUNDAY SONG

My super sweet granddaughter, Autumn.

This is my sweet Sunday song,

All fresh and clean on a Sunday morn',

Thinkin' 'bout peace on this earth,

Here's my idea, for what it's worth.

Keep on love, love, lovin' your brother,

It's really not that hard to do,

Show respect for your Dad and your Mother,

Good things will come back to you.

When you walk outside greet your neighbor,

A smile can work wonders today,

When you can, do others a favor,

Then God's blessings will be on the way.

This is my sweet Sunday song,

Yeah, it's corny and sappy all through,

However, you know in your heart,

That all that I'm sayin' is true.

Keep on love, love, lovin' yourself now,

Forget all the bad things you've done,

Put all your worries on the shelf now,

As your soul shines bright as the sun.

Thank Jesus for showing us mercy,

Kindness, goodness, and love,

If we walk in his steps we will soon see,

All the blessings that come from above.

This is my sweet Sunday song,

Thank God for the joy that he brings,

This is my sweet Sunday song,

I hope all the earth one day sings...

This is my sweet Sunday song...

Saturday Salutations

A salutation is a polite expression of greeting or goodwill. (For all of you in Goofy Ridge)

Happiness fills my old grumpy heart when I find that 25 good people viewed my blog yesterday, in spite of it not being posted on Fazeboog!

25 viewers is more than enough to encourage me to continue on with my blog, namely..."My Life Is Only For Laughs."

What an appropriate name, too, because I never really accomplished anything of any impotance in my life. On the other hand, I guess about EVERYTHING I did was impotent, just not important!

Are you with me on this? Since my life will never make any difference to the world, or folks in general...my life is only for laughs!

Don't get me wrong, I would have loved to make a great scientific discovery, found a cure for the common cold, or wrote a profound, thought provoking novel (instead of my book Chickens' Butts and Coconuts), that would be in lye-berries all over the whole wide worm, but alas, such tings will never be! (What tings?)

I suppose that it's okay...I mean...my life being only for laughs and all. Look at Don Knotts. From the tom he was on the Steve Allen Show as the "nervous" guy on the street, to portraying Barney Fife, to making funny, funny movies, HIS life was only for laughs. Only one big difference between him and me...he made a zillion dollars making folks laugh, and I've made el zippo! 

The view counter says that 26,038 viewers have viewed my blog! I do not believe it, because I rarely receive any comments, except from my stunningly beautiful wife, Donna, my ever faithful friend Yellow Rose Mim Cheryl Merritt, and the also stunningly beautiful Kiel Villeneuve. (Just kidding Kiel, later on let's go play some rugby, eat pork rinds with some of that ghost pepper sauce, and crack our knuckles!)

Since my life is only for laughs, it does give me a feeling of freedom, reckless abandon, and fun, because I'm a role model to nobody, not responsible for nuthin', and pretty much go unnoticed by the muggers! That ain't bad, is it?

So to make a long story even longer...uh...crap...I forgot what I was gonna say! 

Anyway...have a laughter filled Saturday!!