BEllICOSE, BELLIGERANT, & BOSTEROUS BYSANTIUM!

CONSTANTINOPLE

I guess I can write just about anything I want today because the whole wide worm is totally out of control and the Byzantine Empire has absolutely nothing on this circus we love to call Hamerica!

Of course, we all know about Bysas, the Justinian Code, and Greek Fire, but what difference does that make now, with the Individual Mandrake looming over our punkin' hades, and Crisp Crispy being the guber notorious guberner of Nue Joyzee!

I don't need no stinkin' hells care anywho, so stop promisin' me aboot keepin' my secret hells care plan if I like it, and my witch doctor if I wanta keep that old sawbones!

I jus won't be gettin' sic, and it's way to respensive to die, with funnelrall costs, gaskets, an tombstone pizzas!

Richie Incognito is a gruntleman and a squaller compared 2 my army Grill Surgeont who repeatedly beliddled my pour buttox, whilst I grawled threw the dirty ducks on me bellicose, inda Veet Nomb area!

Sure, I know, Byzantium was the wealziest nazion from AD 500 to ?, an led in ard, muzig argatechyoure, an bizwags, but is it nog Hameriga Vespugy that iz 17 trillion pazoozas in dead?!

It taags lots of hard worms to spend 17 trillion pazoozas, wit know retention of baying it pac! 

The Byzantine Umpire had know gun controlled lars, no congealed carrie lars, an loads a swords!

This waz bag when bing kilt waz a hacky thing, an fun waz cudding owwd they tung!

WHY? WHY, due everybum gomplain so mugs, when weed kin enjerm all the pressures of paradize all the Tom?!!

Byzantium did dent effen had fludge toylots!

Zo iv u feel lige u got it blad, u doughn!

BURMA SHAVE