Water, Water Everywhere!

Water, water, everywhere/And all the boards did shrink; Water, water,everywhere, Nor any drop to drink...
The Rime Of The Ancient Mariner, by Coleridge

Well, this is not the whole rhyme (AKA rime), but it shows how often we think something is one way, but it's really another way.

If you're like me, you thought that the line was, "Water, water, everywhere/and not a drop to drink." Period!

Of course, you younger folks, who really don't read my blog much, have never even heard the misquoted phrase, because you have to focus upon Fortnite, and important things like that.

Should be YOU'RE.

 (Correction approved by word police)

Then again, I'm not saying my blog is more important than Fortnite, but it is WAY less addicting! Ha ha! I gotcha there...or did I?

Speaking of water, we got LOTS of it here in Central Illinois this year, and I think most of the good ole U.S. of A. is in the same boat! 

Get it? Water? Same boat? Never mind.

Another speech thing people often say is, "I could care less." Which actually means, the opposite of, "I couldn't care less."

For instance...

Man 1 - "Bosco died."
Man 2 - "I could care less."

Man 1 - "Oh, so you liked Bosco, huh?"

Man 2 - "No, I could not stand that big jerk!"

Man 1 - "But you just stated you "could care less," which means you actually care MORE than less."

Man 2 - "What?!!

Man 1 - "I think, what you meant to say is I couldn't care less, which means you despised this dude so much, you could not care less about his demise."

Man 1 - "Just shaddap you face!" 

I'm not really one to be the "word police." When it comes to correcting other people's sentences, I could care less!

Moving back to water, we have our rivers, lakes, ponds, creeks, tributaries, bird baths, reservoirs, and anything that can hold water, filled to the brim with H2O, but our lawns are starting to dry up, and the farmers say they need rain!

Maybe we found who to blame..hmmm?

If I were God (give thanks I'm not), I would tell everybody, "Hey! I gave you tons and buckets of rain this spring, and now you're complaining your lawns are dry?! Good heavens! Why not take the water that's overflowing in your rivers, lakes, ponds, creeks, tributaries, bird baths, reservoirs, and anything that can hold water, and put it on your stupid lawns!! I'd be flooding all your butts until your hats floated, if it weren't for the "rainbow covenant!"

Aren't you glad I'm not God? And everybody said, Amen!!