WHAT AM I DOIN' WRONG, GANG?

Okay, gang...what am I doin' wrong? 

The views on my blog slipped a bit yesterday, I'm back to receiving 0 to no comments again, and my back is killing me!

I know we are preoccupied with less important thangs, like vacations, domestic terrorism, trade wars, the trouble at the border (those Canadians need to back off), and  dogs making poo poo in our front yards...but don't you REALLY need to get your ducks in a row, priority wise, and focus in on Bloggadocious 222?

I have included a comprehensive questionnaire to scientifically narrow down the culprit, metaphorically speaking, 'who" is sabotaging  my fabulous blog responses and stuff. 

1. I occasionally miss reading Bloggadocious 222 because...
a. I'm on vacation in Belize.
b. Taking Bosco to the dog groomer.
c. Forming a terrorist group against vegans.
d. Trimming my ugly toenails..ugh!
e. I have no idea.

2. I do not comment on Bloggadocious 222 because...
a. I've been abducted by Glirkazoids.
b. I only write in hieroglyphics. 
c. I don't REALLY read your crappy blog.
d. My religion forbids me to comment on ANYTHING.
e. I have no idea.

3. Danny, you could improve your blog by...
a. Having zero questionnaires.
b. Including more photos of puppies and kittens.
c. Giving out freebies for each comment received.
d. Making them much shorter, than even Tom Cruise.
e. I have no idea.

4. Bloggadocious 222 is too...
a. Political
b. Radical
c. Liberal
d. Unconstitutional 
e. I have no idea.

5. If I were writing Bloggadocious 222, I would...
a. Quit
b. Take a long walk off a short pier.
c. Send it to President Trump for review.
d. Stop being so dumb.
e. I have no idea.

Pencils down, class!

Let me thank you in advance for your edifying comments, suggestions and put downs! We value your amateur opinions, and will make every effort to disregard any and all comments that make us look bad, here at the Bloggadocious 222 Headquarters.

Good day!!

Gary

OUT OF THIS WORLD WEDNESDAY...The Inside Story

Stuck In The Middle With You!

Rosie

When we last stalked dropped in on 

our intrepid (Intrepid - fearless, adventurous (often used for rhetorical or humorous effect), Glirkazoid superheroes, Rosie and Gary, they, along with their Silver Sausage spazeship, had been swiftly devoured by a monstrous spaze beast that we will call, Phil.

Phil 

Short for philiskaptiustackadacdanipickathiseaticusallicus

GARY - "So here we are, Rosie! In the belly of the beast!"

Rosie - "I don't know if I can stomach this, Gary!" 

Gary - "Do you have any digestions, I mean, suggestions?"

Rosie - "Wait 'till he poops us out?"

Gary - " Negative, Rosie. 

A philiskaptiustackadacdanipickathiseatacusallieus only poops every 700 yarstrabursts, and his/her stomach acid will soon eat through the Silver Sausage and disintegrate us in a matter of a specktic!" (a specktic is REALLY fast!!)

Rosie - "I have a gut feeling as to how we can get out of this mess, Gary!!"

Gary - "Would you stop with the tummy jokes! Why do you keep churning them out?"

Rosie - "All joking aside, I think I know how to make an exit out of "Phil's solar plexus!!

Remember the ancient Earth movie, Mars Attacks?"

Gary - "Yes! But you hate ancient Earth movies! How did you know about that one?"

Rosie - "I lost a bet. Anyway, when the earthlings played that Slim Whitman song, the Martian's heads exploded! Do you remember the song, Gary?"

Gary - "Sure I do! It was Indian Love Call!"

Rosie - "Oh dear, we can't play that one, because it makes Glirkazoid heads explode as well!"

Gary - "Why don't we blast out OTHER terrible ancient Earth songs over our loud speakers that we know do not make our heads explode, but may work on Phil, or Phyllis?"

Rosie - " Fabulous idea, Gary! Here goes...

At the playing of the last horrific song, "Phil" explodes into a million pieces, leaving the Silver Sausage spazeship and inhabitants intact! Although, very slimy! 

What will our fearless, Glirkazoid gladiators do now?

Join us next Wednesday to find out!!

How Will They Carry On?

It's getting more difficult to write an encouraging, somewhat humorous blog, amidst the heartless violence in the world today.

I can't imagine what it is like for those who lost loved ones in a senseless shooting. How do they carry on with their day to day activities after such a heartbreaking event in their lives?

Even as a Christian, I know I would find it hard to remove the hatred for the shooter from my heart, and not blame God for what happened. 

That's the rub, because if we don't forgive, and believe in God's love no matter what, we will be doomed to live a life of endless suffering and sadness, in perpetual disintegration of our soul.

I'm in total amazement when a news reporter interviews the parents of a child who was brutally murdered by some madman, and they express forgiveness for the murderer, and are comforted by the fact their child is in the arms of Jesus. 

I have to be honest. I want to be a Christian like that, and I pray that I'm a Christian like that, but I REALLY don't know if I could be that strong and faithful.  

But I would have to be, to be able to continue living and serving the Lord, and my family.

I pray for the family members of the victims of all the mass shootings in recent years. May God bless your efforts to forgive and carry on, knowing that God's love surpasses all of our understanding. 

The Legend Of The Mountain

Many, many moons ago, ancient warriors told 

THE LEGEND OF THE MOUNTAIN!

It's imperative , that you click on this music while you read this!

Music clicked on? Okay!

The mountain was located in south central China, and the local inhabitants were fearful of this massive peak, due to the fact that a giant dragon dwelt at the top, sink holes would swallow up would-be mountain climbers, fiery lava flowed from hidden crevices, screeching monkeys would swing down on vines, unexpectedly, to get in folks faces, giant cockroaches blocked the trails, looking all ugly and nasty....and a lot more horrible stuff we don't have time to get in to! They called the mountain...

Mount Kawayotahondamitsubishi.

Every summer a young warrior was sent up the side of  Mount Kawayotahondamitsubishi to attempt to slay the dragon, which, in turn, would fix the sink holes, stop the lava flow, muzzle the screeching monkeys, cold-cock the cockroaches, and end all the other horrible stuff on the mountain .... but for 1000 years not one warrior survived the terrible Mount Kawayotahondamitsubishi!!

Then, one special day, a small, unassuming boy volunteered to brave all the death dealing dilemmas that dotted the dangerous Mt. Kawayotahondamitsubishi!!

His name was So-Hi! Which means, child who conquers all the bad stuff on Mt.Kawayotahondamitsubishi!!

It was a dark, stormy morn' when So-Hi trekked the long, arduous 500 feet, to the base of Mt. Kawayotahondamitsubishi!!

So-Hi spoke to the mountain in a loud voice (people talked to mountains in ancient times) ..."Mt. Katoyotahondasubishimit! Listen to me!! We need to talk!!"

Mt. Kawayotahondamitsubishi - "Say what?"

So-Hi - "I said, Mt. Kahondamitsuotabishi, listen to..."

 Mt. Kawayotahondamitsubishi - "Way, way, WAIT!! You come here to talk to me and cannot even pronounce my name? What a major no-no!! How's about me sending my ginormous dragon down here to eat your face, So-Hi!! Hmmm?"

So-Hi - "Aha! I know your tricks, you tricky mountain! As soon as I pronounce your name correctly, I will become your slave and will NEVER be able to conquer you!!"

Mt. Kawayotahondamitsubishi - "Conquer who?"

So-Hi - "You! Mt. Kawayotahondamitsubishi!!"

Mt. Kawayotahondamitsubishi - "Gotcha!!"

The moral of this story is, even if your name 

means "child who conquers all the bad stuff on Mt.Kawayotahondamitsubishi," doesn't guarantee you can actually do it!

Another thing we learn from this story is don't talk to mountains! You'll never win!

In addition, you may not always have a happy ending, but you will ALWAYS learn something from the experience, like. never trust a mountain, or don't volunteer for a job you clearly cannot do!

The End!

OUT OF THIS WORLD WEDNESDAYThe Voyage Begins

Silver Sausage Spazeship

Imploding planet

Great Jewel Of Neprotonicus 11

It seems like a billion zep-years since we last spied in on Gary and Rosie, our two intrepid Glirkazoid super-E.Ts, who have just started the countdown to zoom the shining Silver Sausage spazeship to Neprotonicus 11, before it implodes at any given moment, and get the Great Jewel Of Neprotonicus 11 off that doomed planet before it's too late!! 

Rosie

Gary

Rosie - "10...9...8..."

Gary - "Wait! Rosie, did you bring my eyeball warmers on board? You know it get's VERY cold on Neprotonicus 11, and my protruding eyeballs tend to chafe in the harsh winds."

Rosie - " Gary! Seriously!! You stop our countdown to ask about "EYEBALL WARMERS?!!" The billions of inhabitants of Neprotonicus 11, who are, as we speak, zooming over to Neprotonicus 12, will not survive if we don't bring the Great Jewel Of Neprotonicus 11 to Neprotonicus 12, so they can have power for air, lighting their homes, warmth, and microwaving their pizzas!!"

Gary - "Sorry. Go ahead and start the countdown again."

Rosie - "Very well. 10...9...8...7..."

Gary - "But, DID you bring the eyeball warmers? It's difficult for me to..."

Rosie - "YES!! YES!!!! I brought the eyeball warmers, you big nag!!! I don't know how you see in those things, anyway!!!"

Gary - "I cut holes in them, where my eyes are!"

Rosie - "But, but...if you cut holes in them where your eyes are,  how do your eyes stay w...NEVER MIND! Your mind in indecipherable!"

Gary - "Why, thank you, Rosie! Go on ahead and restart the countdown."

Rosie - "No. You do it, Gary! I'm tired."

Gary - "Don't mind if I do! 1o...9...8..."

Rosie - "BLAH, BLAH, BLA, BLAH BLAH!!!"

Gary - "Now that's being childish, Rosie!"

Rosie - "I know! But it's SO MUCH FUN!!!"

To make a long story even longer and more boring, Rosie and Gary FINALLY complete the countdown, after a good two and a half parsecs, and the rusty trusty old Silver Sausage spazeship whooshes off to the doomed planet of Neprotonicus 11!

Rosie - "You know what's funny, Gary?"

Gary - "A Rhinillian Gombat in a tutu?"

Rosie - "No, well, yes, that would be hilarious. But, I was thinking how we've been traveling for almost a whole dulu, and we've NOT been attacked by any spaze monsters."

Gary - "Haven't you EVER watched ANY movies at all, Rosie?! You NEVER say anything like that! 
It's like in the ancient Earth movies about wagon trains. The city slickers, are sittin' 'round the campfire with the grizzled old wagon master, and one of them exclaims to the wagon master..."wagon master, we've been on the trail for 3 weeks now and haven't seen one hostile Injun! In fact, it's been peaceful and quiet the whole journey!"

Then the wagon master retorts (first, he spits some tobacco), "It's quiet alright...A LITTLE TOO QUIET!!

At  that, the Injuns attack with flaming arrows, catching the canvas of the wagons on fire, and circling the wagon train so they can be easily shot!

Rosie - "You're a total knucklehead, Gary! Just because I said we haven't been attacked, does not mean that the a spaze monster will..."

At that,  a terrifying spaze monster swoops in and swallows the Silver Sausage in one big gulp!!!

What? Are Gary and Rosie doomed to be digested? Is there ANY way to escape the belly of this hideous beast? 

Join us next Wednesday for OUT OF THIS WORLD WEDNESDAY, and also read my blog on all the other days as well, on Monday, Tuesday, Thursday and Friday! Saturday and Sunday we shut down for a little R&R! (reruns and Raisinets (just kidding about the Raisinets, they are off my diabetic diet, I just mentioned them because that's one thing I ate when I went to the movies as a kid)