I'm So Glad To Talk with You Today!

As the new year begins, I deeply believe that in 2019 Anno Domini, we need more communication and less stagnation. Less staring at our screens, more searching for our dreams. More talking it out, without a scream or a shout. 

"Easier said than done," you proclaim so skeptically. 

Well, it's like the articulate John F. Kennedy once said...

He got us to the moon by inspiring NASA with these words...or he inspired them to fake the moon landing, very convincingly, to fool the Russians.

Yes! It's HARD to put down that smart phone, but I did it! (Well, I never REALLY had a smart phone, but I'm sure I would put it down if someone ever gave me one.)

Start at 3:14 to get to the good part. 

As you may have noticed from my blog, I am communicating a LOT more, if your definition of communicating is writing stuff that most folks ignore. (Except for you precious, devoted, faithful readers.) 

We all have dreams we need to pursue, relentlessly, to keep the fires of passion burning in our pea pickin' hearts!

My dreams include being in a major motion picture (starring role is optional), having one of my "classic" songs become an American Standard (not a toilet), being a writer for a comedy show (a family oriented show), being a comedian on a comedy show, and, well, at my age, just about anything I accomplish is a dream come true. 

     Sample of one of my "classic" original songs.

Talking things out is a lost art. So often, our discussions escalate into screaming matches that go nowhere man!

Why not do as I do. When a discussion begins to become heated, speak in a very low, calm, soothing voice and say, "If you don't shut your trap right now, I'm cutting you out of my will."

After about 30 minutes, they will stop laughing, unless you ACTUALLY have money to leave them, which will even be more effective at helping them pipe down, real quick like. 

So, let's review.

1. Don't act like a clone and put down the phone.

2. Communication is great, don't stagnate.

3. Follow your dreams, stop with the screams. 

In conclusion...

Blog Is Back From Undeserved Break!

It was rough, holding back from blogging over the Christmas and New Years break, but Donna thought it would refresh my mental processes.

I think her exact words were, "stop with the blog, already, you're driving yourself nuts!" 

Well, she was right. I knew I have always driven everybody else nuts, but I didn't realize I was driving myself nuts. 

I'm so much better now. Calm...not worried about deadlines...relaxed...not concerned with trying to make you all laugh every day...but chillin' like raspberry fillin'! (Why don't we pronounce the p in raspberry?)

Totally removing myself from the stresses of blogging for a couple of weeks has given me a new prospective, or prospector on life. 

Either way, I strike gold, someday, right?

No matter. Even if my new, laid back, attitude doesn't lead me to riches and fame, I'll still be here to irritate folks and delight other folks who are inexplicably drawn to reading my inexplicable blog. 

In conclusion, let's just take a few precious moments and meditate on the good things we experienced over the holiday season...

Special Announcement...That I Don't Want My Faithful Readers To Miss!

Be ready to wake up bright and early tomorrow morning (12/21/2o18) to listen to the Greg and Dan Christmas Show on your radio!

Here is a link to the live brodcast...

https://www.1470wmbd.com/shows/greg-dan/

At approximately 6:10 AM (AM means the morning, for those in Goofy Ridge), a VERY special guest will call in from a far away country, and the WORLD PREMIER of a, soon to be a classic, song will resonate in your brains with the joy of Christmas sounds, that will, most likely be the highlight of this yuletide season, for all with that childlike wonderment still abiding in your little hearts. 

Here is a little reminder of when it will be on the air...

 59 seconds early would even be better!

Did I give you all the link? 

No? Here it is...
https://www.1470wmbd.com/shows/greg-dan/

So, if you are willing to take a leap of faith...arise early, dust off the old radio, tune it to 1470 AM or 100.3 FM if you're in the central Illinois area, or click on the link if you live ANYWHERE else in the world and enjoy the festive, historical, hysterical, unconventional, iconic, Greg and Dan's Annual Christmas Extravaganza! 

You may even hear this blogger on the show, but not realize it. 

Me...not Chevy The Dog!

Sorry, I Was Not Able To Entertain You With My Fascinating Blog Yesterday

Most of you already know why I didn't do my blog yesterday, but FYI, Breanna is doing as well as can be expected, after, still another surgery. 

Thank you for your multitude of prayers for her. We are hoping she can be home for Christmas, Lord willing.

Of course, my job is to bring Christmas cheer and lighthearted silliness to the starving masses (starving for humor), so I need to keep a "stiff upper lip," and "carry on my wayward son," or something like that. 

My mom always told me, "Danny Boy (she called me that when she was about to share some words of wisdom), when you travel down the bumpy road of life, remember this, your smile can create a steamroller...

...that will smooth out those bumps, and your laughter will conquer a figurative fall from Mt. Everest, with a parachute of  levity...

...and when EVERYTHING goes against you, your humor will push it back like four BIG DEFENSIVE LINEMEN pushing back the offensive linemen on the goal line to save the game!"

Okay, my mom never ever said that, but you get the point, right?

You don't? 

This song will explain it better than I ever could...

Join me tomorrow for an exciting announcement!

Christmas Programs At YOUR Church...

Dreams Or Disasters?

Okay, you have a bunch of reluctant, amateur performers, for the most part, many under the age of five, an outdated sound system, not much practice time, always a few missing because of illness, somebody chickening out at the last minute...aside from that, what could go wrong?

I really should not be the one to write about this, because I love ALL Christmas programs, disasters included!

However, I've never been to one of those gigantic Christmas extravaganzas that fancy dancy churches display, with a symphony orchestra, a choir of 500 plus souls, professional singers and actors, and a live nativity scene. (Watch where you step!)

I'm sure I would like one of those deluxe performances as well, but I would miss the little disasters, mistakes, and technical equipment malfunctions that are sure to happen in a small church production like we 

have every year. 

Please don't misunderstand me. We have some tremendous performers at our small church. Click on the link below and you'll see Adam doing a super job on the Christmas version of Hallelujah, that was originally written by Leonard Cohen as a secular song.

https://whttps://www.facebook.com/jill.gaugerkohtz/videos/2177200618969463/

Of course, we wouldn't expect Leonard Cohen to write a Christmas song, since he was Jewish, ALTHOUGH...Irving Berlin was Jewish and he wrote "White Christmas. " 

What a great, multi-cultural country, folks!

I think I may be getting off subject a bit.

Christmas programs! That's it!

I get a big kick out of the kids saying the wrong lines, adding funny things accidentally, dancing when they are not supposed to be dancing, and generally messing up, unless it makes them cry, then I feel guity for laughing. 

On the other hand, I don't get a chuckle when I blow it, like I did with my solo, yesterday.

I blame the CD. The CD didn't provide me with enough notes! I need to have a sufficient amount of notes to follow, and there were so few of them! If you don't believe me, watch the video, especially at the beginning, and listen for notes...or lack there of...

As you could clearly hear, I got "off time" because of a lack of notes!

Anyway, EVERYBODY else did wonderful! 

I guess there always has to be the ones to make the gaffs, like Uncle Joe Biden.

It keeps us humble. 

When we start getting too sure of ourselves, God steps in and proves that whatever gifts and talents we have are dependent on him. A "big head" is not attractive to God, or anybody else! 

Now, tell us about YOUR church 

Christmas programs, Christmas shows, and/or EXTRAVAGANZAS. 

Sharing is caring, and we CARE about getting a good laugh...tear...or Christmas cheer!!! 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=38WmunGvaJI

Special Saturday Blog For My Faithful Readers...Short And Sweet

If you took the time to check out my blog today, please place this secret word on my Facebook page...

Thanks, folks!
Link to Facebook...
https://www.facebook.com/danny.maness.5

Did You Know This Is "Buy Your Pet A Christmas Gift" Day? 

Since our pets are people, too...Dec. 14th is designated as the day we go out and buy our pets Christmas gifts.

How do I know that? I know that because I just made it up. A GREAT idea, don't you think?

Tell me, how many times did Christmas morning come along and you see your pet's sad face, and suddenly realize you forgot to buy a gift for Fido, or Felix, or Flicka, or Moby, or Tweety.

Lots of times, I bet.

So now we have a special, designated, singled out, ear marked, set aside day to buy our dear pets a gift.

I know. I'm a genius.

So what are you waiting for? The designated day is almost done, dudes, and dudettes! 

Get out there to the pet stores and do your duty! Pardon the expression.