Friday Fun And Frolics
(Please click on the video clips, You're missing a lot if you do not)

I haven't done a Friday Fun and Frolics blog posting in many moons! 

In fact, I don't think I've EVER done a Friday Fun and Frolics blog posting! 

So we're doin' this thang together, "cause it's Friday, and we want to have FUN, and we LOVE to FROLIC!!

I'm dancin' folks! Look at me, I'm dancin'!!

frolic

[ frol-ik ]

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noun

merry play; merriment; gaiety; fun.

a merrymaking or party.

playful behavior or action; prank.

verb (used without object), frol·icked, frol·ick·ing.

to gambol merrily; to play in a frisky, light-spirited manner; romp:The children were frolicking in the snow.

to have fun; engage in merrymaking; play merry pranks.

adjective

merry; full of fun.

Chihuahua! I haven't frolicked in so long, I almost forgot what it's like! 

The Nature Cat gang are great frolickers!

Spring is the PERFECT time for fun and frolicking amidst the flowers, butterflies, and those gigantic bumblebees that buzz the heck outta ya! 

Those bees sound like B52 bombers flyin' around your punkin' head, and they will make you feverishly, frolic frenetically faster, folks!! 

It's all good, though, because Friday is the "golden" day of the week, when almost zero work gets done at your place of employment, unless you're a server in a restaurant, and all thoughts are on the blessed weekend that will be absolutely marvelous, if it don't rain.

In conclusion, why are you wasting your time reading this blog? Get out in the glorious sunshine and frolic to your hearts content!! Just don't break anythang! Like your bones!

Kapeesh?

Late Again...Not Great Again...DRAT!

(Sung to the tune of "Love Letters In The Sand)

♪♪On a day like today, I pass the time away, writing Bloggadocious in my chair..air...air...air,♪

♪Even though I am late, I'm sure it won't  be great,
Writing Bloggadocious in my chair,♪♪

♪♪You made a vow, that you, would read all the way through,
But somehow, that vow, was superseded by your brew,♪

♪Now my broken heart aches as I correct all my mistakes,
Writing Bloggadocious, in my chaaaaaair!♪♪

Yes, folks, once a gain I'm late with my blog, and there ain't nuttin' woice! 

I try, I really try, but life happens!

Disclaimer: This video is only included because I said, "I try, I really try," like Billy Jack, so please ignore the violent section at the end, in fact, just turn it off when Billy says, BERSERK. Thank you!

Early is my middle name! Danny Early Maness (really, it's Bruce, but I like Early better), and I've been an early guy since I was a child. I may have even been born early, but I can't remember.

The reason I always want to be early is because I never want to miss something.

For instance: "Danny, too bad you came late, The Beatles stopped by 5 minutes ago and sang "Ob-La-Di Ob-La-Da for us!"

"Danny, if you had been here on time, you too would have received a million dollars from Howard Hughes like all of us did!" 

Maybe the main reason I despise being tardy is because of the stares, soft chuckles, almost indecipherable ridicule I receive from onlookers as I enter the scene. 

Then I realize, if I wasn't such a fanatic about promptness, they wouldn't make sport with me! 

Make sport: To joke about someone in a way that makes them feel stupid. 

I need to be late more frequently, to remove the stigma of being an "early bird"!

On the other hand, "the early bird catches the worm!" But, WHO WANTS A WORM?!! Yes, maybe someone going fishin', but lures are way less slimy. 

You might be thinking that my obsession with being early is a strain on my beautiful wife, Donna, but serendipitously, she is an earlier bird than me!

Serendipitous is an adjective that describes accidentally being in the right place at the right time, like bumping into a good friend in some unusual location, or finding a hundred dollar bill on the ground.

Her feats of earliness are legendary! Just ask her kids! However, I'm not gonna embarrass her by retelling these phenomenal tales of her being sooner than expected. That would NOT be a wise move on my part!

I don't know where this photo was taken, but I know she was early!

Anyway, let me apologize once again for my rudeness of making you wait for your daily dose of droll diversion! 

"After all, tomorrow is another day!"

Making You Happy Is My Ultimate Goal

Oft times I sway away from my dedicated goal of making my lovely blog readers happy, whilst putting them in a state of confused delirium by way of bizarre ideas and nonsense.

I apologize when I begin to complain about stuff that bothers me, leaving you guys a bit sad and verklempt. 

It's like my old grandpa Estey (named after an Estey piano) used to say to me, "Rocky (he always called me Rocky for some strange reason...and this was LONG before the Rocky movies), if ya can't laugh a little each day, ya ain't really livin', and Rocky, the more ya cry, the less you'll pee, boy...and never look a gift horse in the mouth, 'cause horses have very bad breath...and laugh and the whole wide worm laughs at ya, because ya can't always get whatcha want, even if you're a rollin' stone!"

Yes, grandpa Estey was crazy, but I learned a lot from him! Who said, "I know?"

It's like when I mowed my lawn yesterday, for the first time this year. I was actually happy and singing songs to myself as I toiled  along! Songs like...

AND

AND

Along with singing songs to myself, I'll meditate on the deeper things of life, as merrily I mow along.

Things like, why do they call a shoe, a shoe? Do birds go wee wee? Could Chuck Norris have defeated Godzilla? Why don't they have a White Castle hamburger joint in Peoria?!!!

These are perplexing, frustrating questions that...wait a sec...here I go again complaining about stuff, instead of concentrating on your happiness and inner peace. 

Why should you care that we don't have a White Castle in Peoria, or nowhere near Peoria. You probably have one across the street! Maybe you don't even like White Castle hamburgers, and wish they didn't exist!! Right?!!

Whoops. I did it again. Just let me catch my breath and we will conclude with something that should make us all deliriously happy and tranquil.

Don't ignore the above video if you want to reach pure Nirvana!

Believe It Or Not, It Makes No Difference To Me

Hi!  All of you faithful readers out there know how much I love anything about U.F.O's, space aliens, Bigfoot sightings, Loch Ness Monster stories, tales of Leprechauns, unicorns, fairies, any and all things strange, weird and unusual. 

However, I don't necessarily BELIEVE these accounts of U.F.Os, space aliens, Bigfoot, Loch Ness Monster, unicorns, fairies and such.

I just wish that one time someone would take a clear video of a U.F.O. landing, a space alien climbing out of it, and the other worldly being saying something profound to the world. 

They are always grainy pictures, the spacecraft is far away from the videographer, the camera is moving all around, and you NEVER see an E.T. staring out of the window. 

Along the same lines, I don't want to see a far away video of some dude in a Bigfoot suit who's walking real fast. I want an interview with Bigfoot! 

Reporter: "So, you're the elusive Bigfoot, right?"

Bigfoot: "Last time I looked."

Reporter: "How do I know you're not just some big guy in a Bigfoot costume?"

Bigfoot: "I can prove it." At that, he eats the reporter!

Now, that's the kind of thing that would convince me!

Look at this supposed photo of the Loch Ness Monster...

Really? This could be ANYTHING! I've seen millions of tree branches floating down the river that looked exactly like this. I would like to see some eyes, teeth, flippers, a long tongue? 

I believe this photo was made before photoshop, so maybe it's really Nessie, but I need more evidence, like seeing her, or him, at Sea World! (Does Sea World still exist? I'm not sure.)

What bugs me the most are the paranormal shows! Paa-lease! What an easy way to make a buck! 

They go into an old house, abandoned insane asylum, or the Angkor Wat temple, with fake, ghost detecting equipment, and act like they're hearing and seeing entities from the spirit world. 

Of course, their sound guy is making the sounds and everything you see is just a quick flash, or a computer animated image, but it goes something like this...

Bob: "Here we are at the Angkor Wat temple, in Cambodia, at midnight, in pitch darkness, and (creepy, indecipherable growling sound from unseen sound guy), what was that?! It sounded like a demon spirit was saying, GET OUT OF HERE OR I'LL EAT YOU!!

How easy is THAT? Even I could do that!! 

Sometimes a girl named Tiffany, or something like that, will scream, and exclaim, "I just witnessed a ghostly form floating down the hallway! Oh, my!"

Come on, are you gonna believe Tiffany? She lies about everything! 

"Well, you say, "Tiffany had video evidence!" 

First, videos can be doctored to show us whatever THEY want us to see, but even more important is this question...how can physical, recording and video equipment, capture spiritual images? I don't get it.

Ghost hunting equipment.

Maybe I'm just dumb, or too skeptical, or living in Realville, like Rush Limbaugh, oh, I don't know, but...hey, I'm like Doubting Thomas! Remember him? 

He said, he needed to physically see the nail holes in Jesus' hands and feet, and the sword wound in his side...only then would he believe! 

Bring me a U.F.O. and put it on my doorstep, let me examine Bigfoot personally, or swim with the Loch Ness Monster, and MAYBE I'll believe then.

No matter, I still love watching all of the bizarre, ridiculous, Syfy, Leprechaun hunting T.V. shows and eating pork rinds, to escape from the daily stresses of being retired!! 

Easter Was FAR Different In My Youth

Easter was FAR different when I was a child. I'm not talking about the  worship part. That's very much the same, but the biggest difference to me is the dressing up part.

In St. Louis, where I grew up, the streets were filled with beautifully dressed folks on Easter morning. The little boys in little suits, little ties, and highly polished shoes ... the little girls in frilly white dresses and bonnets.

Bonnets! I loved the bonnets with the ribbons and such! Too bad we don't go the bonnet route anymore, even though some choose to put bonnets on babies, but that don't count.

♪In your Easter Bonnet, with all the frills upon it...♪♪

Remember that song? For years I sang that song, but I never knew what," you'll find that you're in the rotogravure, meant. 

We didn't have Google back then, and I was too proud to admit I didn't know the meaning of the word, although I was only 4 years old, so I made up possible meanings.

Rotogravure: A spinning grave? Thus, the term, "he'll be spinning in his grave!" (Hey! I was only 4)

Rotogravure: A spit that turns meat over an open fire. Like a rotisserie?

No! Here is the REAL definition!

ro·to·gra·vure

/ˌrōdəɡrəˈvyo͝or/

noun

1. a printing system using a rotary press with intaglio cylinders, typically running at high speed and used for long print runs of magazines and stamps.

   "we would love to find a sheet suitable for rotogravure that is not exorbitantly priced"

   • NORTH AMERICAN

     a sheet or magazine printed by rotogravure, especially the color magazine of a Sunday newspaper.

     plural noun: rotogravures

     "you could go to the races in it and get your picture in the rotogravure"

   

   
   

   • 
     

   
   

   Seriously? I'm really not quite sure what it is, but I STILL sing it, because it sounds fancy!

   
   
2. 
   
   

I lost track of what I was writing about. 

Easter finery, that's it, Easter finery! 

My dad hardly ever dressed up in a suit, but there he was, on Easter day, looking as snazzy as can be in his rarely worn suit, and, of course, smelling like old spice!

Pretty much the same story with my mom. She preferred wearing pants or shorts in the summer, and a dress was only for special occasions, and that was back in the June Cleaver days when lots of women wore dresses. 

The metamorphosis from mom to Myrna Loy was amazing! Making Easter morning a magical time of transformation and joy!

Speaking of Easter...yesterday I sang at the Easter service at church, but don't think I wrote this stuff about Easter as a ploy to have you watch the video of me singing "Holy Ground" to begin the Easter program. You all know me better than that...right?