Friday, October 11, 2013

THOUGHTFUL THURSDAY

 It's easy being pessimistic when problems come along,
It makes a lot of folks get stinking drunk, light up a bong.

It takes more effort just to smile , be happy, optimistic ,
Especially when you feel like you are viewed as a statistic.

When someone's disrespecting an old friend that you may know,
Do you stand up and defend her, or just go with the flow?

You could say, "she really helped you, the time that you were down,
Try looking at her good points, there are plenty to be found."

The news reports from round the world are sure to make us cry,
We get depressed from watching people suffering and die,
However, if we turn off the T.V. and venture out,
We can help our friends and neighbors, the ones who weep about,

The rising cost of living, their aches and pain and heartbreak,
Optimism is what they need, but it's not a piece-a-cake.

To make them see there's always hope, and the Lord will send a blessing,
Anyway, what good is there in worrying and stressing.

The bible tells us not to fret on the things we want to eat,
Or the clothing that we want to wear, or the shoes upon our feet.
Your Heavenly Father knows in detail everything we need,
Seek first His Kingdom, and righteousness and we surely will succeed.

It's easy to be pessimistic and bring down all our friends,
It's hard to be an optimist and lend a helping hand,
To smile and laugh, build others up, even though we may be low,
We'll find it makes us happy too, and sets our hearts aglow.





Thursday, October 10, 2013

THOUGHTFUL THURSDAY



Democrat or Republican,
On this we can agree,
That congress cares about themselves,
Instead of you and me.

They vote themselves a pay raise,
Fly their jets and take their perks,
Then laugh on a Caribbean cruise,
At all of us ignorant jerks. 

They close OUR national monuments,
And stop the White House tours,
But keep their golf course open,
While their liquor pours and pours.

I hear our Veterans may not get pay,
Their families have to suffer,
No benefits for heroes dead,
Could they make it any tougher?

America...America,
God shed his grace on thee,
And throw out all those greedy bums,
So we may all be free!


Wednesday, October 9, 2013

OUT OF THIS WORLD WEDNESDAY




Gary was not the mightiest, or brightest, of all the Glirkazoids that came out of the Academy, but the ancient ones knew he was the purest in heart!




That was the most important quality for a true hero! 

Gary was sincere and kind to others, and would not even hurt a phly, until he needed to defend the helpless from an evil villain! 




That is when he had the heart of a glion, and gained tremendous strength and power!




The ancient Glirkheads decided it was time for Gary to go on a sacred mission, to release those who were held captive by the wicked, ugly, Badazzbeast, on the planet Fartzfluffer!




The Badazzbeast had flown his spazeshipp to Glirka and kidnapped 222 young Glirkazoids to be his slaves!

It was Gary's job to bring all of them home safely.

It would not be easy!

First, Gary would need to hitch a ride on a cargo ship headed to Fartzfluffer,
find the abductees, defeat the Badazzbeast, and get the precious ones back to Glirka in one piece, uh, or 222 pieces...you know what  mean!

Could Gary accomplish this monumental task?!  

Aha! Let us not forget, Gary is pure in heart, and being pure in heart is the greatest weapon for fighting wickedness and evil!

Gary was able to use his infinite charm and finagle a ride to Fartzfluffer.

He then diguised himself as a Fartzfluffion, wearing a big Sombrero, a fringed vest, a plaid kilt, and flipflops...the traditional Fartzfluffion outfit.

Gary pulled out his GPS, and went pee-pee. (A GPS, Glirkazoid Peeing System, is what a male Glirkazoid calls his "winker")

Hey! Get off my case! Just trying to teach you the Glirkazoid tongue as we go along!

Gary was an excellent detective and tracker, and used all of his 7 senses to try and locate the poor little Glirkazoid captives!

When that failed, he asked some dude on the street corner, who just happened to know where they were.

Gary shuttered when he was told that they were being held atop the...


Dramatic music!

Mountain Of A Thousand Deaths!!!



Whoa! Will Gary be able to rescue his fellow Glirkazoids?

Will he survive the Mountain Of A Thousand Deaths?

Will he stop at a White Castle for hamburgers?
Oh, I hope so!!

Will he need help from Glrrrl((()))##++yowow77?!



Join us next week for the answers, okay?

Monday, October 7, 2013


The carousel at the House on the Rock, located in Spring Green, Wisconsin, is claimed to be "the world's largest indoor carousel".The carousel features 269 carousel animals, 182 chandeliers, over 20,000 lights, and hundreds of mannequin angels hanging from the ceiling.

Before you read my blog post, please click on the secret

 link at the top of the page, just move your cursor above

 the photo of the carousel, and it will appear... you 

can thank me later!

Go ahead! You are not permitted one step farther until 

you do!!  Please? You'll REALLY like it!!!



It was by the carousel above that I totally surprised 

my lovely Donna Dee, and proposed to her.

First I sang  "I Want You, I Need You, I Love You," got 

down on one knee and "popped the question!"

I was nowhere near as good as Elvis, or as "hot!"

Ain't I a romantic devil?



This carousel has no horses...take a look!


By the way, Donna said, YES!

The House On The Rock is the most magical place I've ever been! Some of the "artifacts" are genuine and some are replicas, but it does not make a difference to me!

It is grand, magnificent, filled with music from giant music machines, fascinating, glowing with beautiful colored lights, quaint, nostalgic, and like a lovely dream!

I am not going to waste time telling you all about it, click on the links and videos, and the pictures will flood your imagination with the the truly unique experience!


I did this blog post for you, Baby Angel!!!

I LOVE YOU!


MANESS MUSIC MONDAY



I'm sorry I'm late with my song today, but I wrote the worms last night and didn't put them to music until this morning.

I made a wideo and thought it turned out pretty funny! (He said so humbly)

Sooo, once again, another messterpiece by the late, great Danny Madness, who is me!

Who IS me, anyway?!!!


Sunday, October 6, 2013

Sorry Sunday




When I was a sophomore in high school I was kind of popular, and a few girls wanted me to dance with them at Teen Town, take them to school activities, and they thought I was funny, interesting, and cute!

I was on the football and wrestling team, and in perfect shape.



During summer vacation I gained 50 pounds!




When I returned to school, I was no longer funny, interesting, or cute to these girls.

In fact, they wouldn't even talk to me, or stand next to me!

I was the same guy as before, only larger!

It taught me a lot about human behavior.

Just like the dude says in the Sonic commercial, "It's what's outside that counts!"




Studies have shown that people will treat a pretty waitress far better than an ugly one.

People with deformities will be stared at, and considered less intelligent by some people.

Beautiful celebrities will be adored by millions of people, even if they are rude, crude, and always in a bad mood!



The greatest, sweetest, most wonderful people I've known were not much for looks!

However, they were beautiful to me!

I don't mean they were beautiful in a symbolic sense, I'm saying they REALLY  became beautiful to my eyes!

Just as if they were  pretty celebrities.

I know, I'm weird, but I see the people I love with my heart, not my eyes!

My grandmas were beautiful, my fat friends, my bald buddies, and every baby I've seen!



This does not make me extra kind, compassionate, or special.

It's just the way I see things, and I can't change that.

On the other hand, some of the prettiest people I have seen, are ugly to the eyes of my heart.


Casey Marie Anthony


Did that episode of the girls rejecting me in high school make me insecure, feeling sorry for myself, and cause me to suffer from life long depression?

Get serious.




HECK YES, IT DID!!!!!!!!

Saturday, October 5, 2013

SILLY SATURDAY


This is part 2 of my 5 part tutorial on how to avoid making BAD videos!

Just to make sure my stepson Josh doesn't kick my keester, here is the way he looks now, as opposed to how he looked in the video:

Not that he looked bad back then..oh, no...he's always been a good looking guy, but just to show he's lost a few pounds since then.

So here is my amazing, breathtaking, stupendous, mesmerizing, part two of "How To Avoid Making Bad Comedy And Music Videos!" (Oscar winning performance by my wife, Donna, on the phone!)


Friday, October 4, 2013

FAN FRIDAY




I am a fan of baby animals. 








When I see baby animals it makes me so happy!

In fact, I don't understand people who do not love baby animals like I do.

It's like somebody not loving the Cardinal's baseball team! 




Unimaginable!

Or not loving White Castle hamburgers! Ha ha ha ha...can you even imagine that?!






Usually when I walk our Yorkie, Benji, down the sidewalk people go awww, and want to pet him. 




However, there are times when folks completely ignore him, and that's just not right!

What has happened to the soul of a person that doesn't love a cute little Yorkie, or baby kittens and pandas.








I have heard that there are a few people that don't like that harmless little fluffball, Rush Limbaugh! Really!!




What's not to love, huh?

He's handsome, charming, funny, fat, like Santa  Claus, from Missouri, says things about the government the way I would say it, if I were, uh, let's see, Rush Limbaugh...or maybe  even Glenn Beck...another universally loved, comical character, who wrote "The Christmas Sweater."




I think I'm like the wreck of the old 97...
getting a little off track! 




Baby animals! That's it! Adorable, frolicking, balls of fluff (like Rush) that God created to make our hearts melt at the first sight of their little faces..or is that feces?




Speaking of doggy doo, I am so glad we have a small doggie who makes tiny poop that's easy to pick up!

I have seen big dog poop along the walking path that is bigger than human poop!

No wonder their owners don't pick it up! They would need a wheelbarrow!

Well, I hope it's big dog poop and not...let's not go there. 

Did you catch the play on worms?
Let's not GO there?

Anyway, if you didn't get it, you shouldn't be reading my blog anyway!

Did I just use anyway twice in a sentence?

Sorry!

Anyway, I think God put love for baby animals in our hearts so we wouldn't kill them and eat them.

Kind of like a protection thingy for them.

Maybe it's the same thing with human babies. Nooo, I don't mean people would eat them if they were ugly, but it sure makes it easier to change their di-tees, clean up their projectile vomit, and wake up all hours of the night to stop their crying when they are so unbelievably cute!






So, for all of you out there who do not love baby animals, human babies, Rush Limbaugh, Glen Beck, White Castle hamburgers, the Cardinals and Yorkies...there is a special kind of H-E- double hockey sticks waiting for you! 

Just kidding! Lighten up gang!

For those of you like me, who loves the same stuff as I do...meet you in doggie heaven, by the White Castle!