Tuesday Afternoon...I'm Just Beginning To See...Now I'm On My Way

I'm REALLY NOT beginning to see anything, or on my way to anywhere, but since it's Tuesday afternoon, I thought I would share the first few words from one of my favorite songs from one of my favorite bands that I saw LIVE 3 times! 

Yes! I was alive when I saw them! 

What band? I can't believe that some of you don't know the band that did Tuesday Afternoon! 

Here's A Hint

No matter. Twas a long time ago! We're talking (gulp) one year shy of 50 years ago since the Boody Mules recorded this masterpiece! 

However, I'm not here to talk about ancient music, anyway. It's the MESSAGE of the song that matters!

The message is that ANY day, even Tuesday, can be a great day if we take the time to enjoy it, and concentrate on the good things about our lives!

Tuesday Weld

Sure, it's easy to dwell on our bills, low paying jobs, poor health, wrinkles, the world going nuts, those added pounds, rotten teeth, leaking faucets, losing our hair, the heartbreak of psoriasis, painful tingling in our toes, and much, much more...but how futile that would be! Right?

Negative thinking makes us sick, physically and mentally. All kinds of studies have proved this! 

There was a study done in Bern Switzerland, by the renowned human behavior doctors, Quakenbush and Pugh, who came to the conclusion that good thoughts (especially on a Tuesday) will contribute to 98.6% better health in rats! (The study was done on rats, not humans)

You're probably thinking, how do they know if rats are having good thoughts or bad thoughts? 

The rats were studied during mating season...but since this is a family friendly blog, we will not get into details.

Let's just say that happy rats are healthy rats, and happy humans are healthy humans!

Not that we are suggesting you do the same thing that made the rats happy, but WHATEVER makes us happy will contribute to our health and well being! Even on Tuesday!!

Chocolate is good on a Tuesday, puppies make us happy on a Tuesday, this also goes for Wheel Of Fortune, receiving our tax refund, listening to the Boody Mules, winning the lottery, dancing like nobody's watching ('cause nobody is), eating ice cream and I could go on and on and on...but you already know that, don't you?

It's true that chocolate and ice cream do not add a lot to our PHYSICAL health, but they do WONDERS for our MENTAL health! So go for it! (moderation being the key~yeah right)

I hope I didn't misspell any words, because when I use a red background, the red spell check line is invisible. 

What am I doing? It's Tuesday! I ain't gonna worry about ANYTHANG today!!!

My Annual Review Of The Oscars

The Red Carpet part was kind of boring. The awards ceremony was REALLY boring, except for that "Shallow" song....

Melissa McCarthy's wild outfit...

and, to be honest, I fell asleep during the awards for make up, set direction, catering, cinnamontography, and other stuff we don't care about...

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...and I didn't wake up until the whole shebang was over, like I do every year. 

How's about youze guys? 

What stood out to you?

The outfits? 

Hey, this pic is from the Golden Globes!

The music?

I mean "Queen"

The host...

If there was absolutely ANY redeeming moment you would like to share about the 2019 Academy Awards, please do so, for the sake of future Oscar watchers who may not REALLY exist.

I slept through a LARGE portion of the show, so feel free to fill me in, if you had the stamina to ride it out to the end! 

Okay, this is the best I can do on a Monday morning, after the "after party" that I don't remember attending, or even being invited to. 

 Alien Abductions Aren't All That Bad 

Alien abductions are generally viewed in a negative light, but Dr. Brahaan Beechaar of South India University has researched alien abductees for over 27 years, and discovered that 98.6 % of  abductees  have experienced an increase in happiness since their close encounters of the 3rd kind. 

Here are a few testimonies from abductees that may surprise you.

Virgil Skrunk...Alien Abductee

Yeah, well, I was kinda shook up when I saw them long robot arms comin' through my window, and I thunk it were a bad dream, until I was pult way up into a funny shaped flyin' thing that was shaped kinda like a Kaiser blade, some call it a sling blade, but I say Kaiser blade, uh hum. 

I thunk they were gonna probe me, but instead they took me to this place that were kinda hunky dory, and made me feel happier than a hound dog on a possum and brung me back home.

Desiree Kittenton...Alien Abductee

I was, like, walking out of the mall, feeling, like,  jelly of my BFF, because she, like, totally grabbed the purse I, you know, NEEDED to buy for the concert, when, like, a UFO, like, just stopped over my head, and a big metal grippy thing came down and, you know, took me inside.

When "they", you know, brought me home, I, like, was at peace, you know, with EVERYBODY, even with Meghan, who, like, took my fav lip gloss. 

Bill Stewart...Alien Abductee

I was the quintessential crabby old man, who never wanted kids on my lawn, griped about my service at restaurants, and didn't even enjoy puppies. 

After the aliens abducted and re-programmed me, I started a daycare business, leave large tips at restaurants, never complain, and have become the president of the ASPCA! 

Wow! Weren't those testimonials out of this world? So much so, I wrote the following song!

I'm Not Trying To Offend Anyone, But..

My blog will be short today. Not that I'm trying to offend short folks. If I were, I'd use midget, shrimp, or maybe pipsqueak, but that would not be kosher, which isn't intended to put down Jewish folks, because I enjoy kosher pickles!

I thought we should have a pow wow about offending our fellow man...whoops, I guess pow wow is not the correct word to use in the face of Indian sensitivities, or even the name Indian, or even fellow MAN! Fellow BEING is probably more better, except more better is most likely offensive to grammer grammar obsessed individuals.

Chihuahua, what's a mother to do...holy mackerel...the Mexican  people will be offended at a white dude saying Chihuahua...and Amos and Andy deniers will be on me like a child on a Twinkie, if they ever find out I used holy mackerel dare Andy!

I'm goofing this up so much I feel like a bum...I mean...tramp...I mean hobo...homeless? That don't seem to fit the narrative. Oh, I don't know. pardner.

Did I just offend a cowboy? It's so difficult to tell, anymore. 

SONGS I MAY HAVE MISHEARD

♪Raindrops on whiskers and roses on kittens, why in the heck are they losing their mittens, wild moons that fly with the geese on their wings, these are a few of my favorite things....♪♪

♪♪In the lad where I was bored, lived a bad, who sailed to seed, and he told me of his lice, in the lad of soobmurines....♪

♪Bre will, Bre will, wok you...Bre will, Bre will wok you....♪♪
















♪♪Me and Boo and a dog named Ewe...♪

EWE The Dog.

♪Karma, just kilt a band, put the gum against his dreads, pulled the digger now he's Ted...♪♪

♪♪Ouuu, Brady, Brady it's a wild worm, deflating your footballs 'till they're not firm...♪

♪They dazed a pair a dice and perked up a parking lot...♪♪

♪♪Imagine there's no oven, to bake your apple pie...♪

♪There's a Lazy who's sure, all that giggles is gold, and she's buying a chair way to 7...♪♪

♪♪♪JUST FOR FUN!!!!♪♪♪

Tell Us Your Winter Story Of 2018/19

I wrote this song a few years back, and I think it goes a long way in describing how I feel about this stinking winter. Please listen to it before continuing...

I sent this song to a Nashville company who recorded it for me. I think they did a great job!

Anyway, the song is a fictional account about a dude who is wanting his gal back, because she walked out on him, because he must have done something BAD, because he's just a lowdown, guitar playin' truck driver. 

Don't focus on those parts of the song, okay? I want you to pay attention to all the parts about snow, cold, blizzards and such, to get the true feeling of what this winter has been like for us poor fools who still live in the stupid wintry regions, but ESPECIALLY for all you folks who live in beautiful warm climates and keep rubbing it in with your photos of flowers, swimming pools and playing golf!!

How many of you have listened to the song yet? C'mon, be transparent. If you have not, go listen to it now, and see if everything I told you is not exactamundo correct!  (A little Spanish lingo for ya)

Did you like the singer? I think he has a GREAT country sounding voice, even though he may be from Brooklyn. You never know. 

Did the worms words make you feel cold, lonely, heartbroken, sad, hopeful, disgruntled, mesmerized, bored, or kinda sick?  I'm happy if ANY feelings were stimulated by my song! I'm kinda desperate, you know.

How has the winter been for you? Why not tell us your most horrible 2018/19 winter story. Were you stranded in sub zero temps? Did you fall on your keister? Did your furnace take a nose dive on the coldest day of the year? We want to hear all the disastrous, frightening tales, not the boring, positive happenings. It's much more fun to whine and complain, don't you think?

 Let's end by watching a video I made, that will send your heart to a lovely winter wonderland of sparkling snow and song! In the meantime, I'll pray for this wicked winter to END!!!