The Complete History Of Friday

Friday. The only man to get all his work done by Friday is Robinson Crusoe.

You young "whipper snappers" will not understand that joke.

In addition, you won't get "whipper snappers" either, but that's "hunky-dory," which you won't...nevermind.

Historically and linguistically speaking, the word Friday comes from the term "free day."

"Free day" started with the ancient Greeks, when after slaves served their masters 24/7 they were given a day at the end of the week to have a few hours of free time to themselves.

On that special "free day," or Friday, as it's known in 2019, the slaves were allowed to wash their clothes, which were no more than rags, bathe in the rivers, but NEVER in the Greek bathing tubs, scrounge food from the Greek garbage dumps, and generally have a great time!

The tradition of "free day," or Friday, transmigrated to the poor, hapless, sweatshop workers of the late 19th century. They still had to work their butts off on Friday, but were allowed to have one smoke break, an old carrot, and a sip of water from a rain barrel. Really not a vast improvement over the Greek slaves, if you ask me. But who's askin' me, right?

There has been a VAST improvement nowadays, when it comes to Fridays! It really doesn't matter to me because I'm like a car who drove on 100 miles of Illinois roads...RETIRED! (Get it! The tires are so damaged, the car needs to be...nevermind.)

Fridays are REALLY "free days" for a whole lot of folks! They bring in doughnuts, smoke wacky tobacky on breaks, do as little as possiroo, lawmakers create lots of holidays on Fridays, so loooong weekends are enjoyed, a lot of horseplay ensues, bosses take the day off, which makes the "mice play" even more (when the cats away the...nevermind), everyone is on their electralogical devices, "testing" all their friends with their thumbs, and it's all gone to hades in a handbasket!!

By now, you faithful readers realize I've made ALL of this up in what's left of my brain, right?

Good! I would not want to think my devoted readers are as gullible as me! Even on a free day I mean Friday!!

Greg And Dan Kept Their Promise

Just Like They ALWAYS Do!!!

If you didn't have the opportunity to hear my new song played on the Greg and Dan radio show this morning, it's all good!

I will put a link to it at the end of this delightful blog story.

Greg and Dan played my profoundly serious song at almost exactly 6:55 AM, EXACTLY as they promised!! Almost exactly, meaning 6:57 AM, but that's really close!

What always touches my heart is how they heap praise on me as their official songwriter, and say that I'm funny! NOBODY thinks I'm funny, so what a sweet blessing to have friends like that who pronounce that I'm funny to hundreds of thousands of listeners!! (Just a guesstimation on the amount of listeners, but they have a whole lot!!)

Just a brief background story on the song...

Yesterday, Greg and Dan were discussing the giant blob that scientists had discovered on the dark side of the moon. 

Well, maybe is was scientists, I'm not sure. It coulda been a satellite, or space probe, or something, but the point is, it was found!

There is a lot of speculation as to what that giant blob may be, so I started doin' some speculatin' myself! I put my speculations into song form and sent it to Greg and Dan. I was happy to learn they would be playing it on their AMAZING radio show this morning!!!! And they did, they did!!!!!!!!!

Another thing I love about my buddies, Greg and Dan, is they don't care how crappy my songs are, they still play them!! In fact, sometimes, the crappier the song, the more they play it!! Go figure.

So here is what you've been breathlessly waiting for...

Blob Inside The Moon

by Danny Maness

Listen To The Greg And Dan Radio Show Tomorrow Morning At 6:55 AM.

I know it's early, but one of my musical creations will be featured at that exact time, give or take a few seconds!

Here is a link to the show if you live far, far away from central Illinois...

https://www.1470wmbd.com/shows/greg-dan/

If you happen to live in central Illinois, tune your transistor radio to 1470 AM or 100.3 FM on your radio dial. 

 I know you're dying to know what they are gonna play, but I ain't tellin' ya!

Let's just say it's very in the news at this juncture in time. 

Here is a hint...

My How Roman Has Grown!

It is almost inconceivable that Roman has grown that much in a mere year!

If time is gonna be moving THAT fast, I need to prepare for his little league baseball games, driving lessons, high school graduation, first flight to Mars....I'm running out of time!!

Just a couple of days ago he said, "Babaw, would you come play with me?" 

Wow! I need to cherish moments like that, because when he's 16 (and I'm 83 or something), he'll say, "would someone prevent this old fart from drooling on me!" However, isn't it fair, since Roman drooled on me plenty of times, and worse than that?!!

Of course, being a grandpa, I have no say-so as to what activities he'll be doing. My choices would be football, wrestling, baseball, karate, fishing, (but not regular fishing...noodling!), kung fu, axe throwing,

And everything all rugged and manly, they way God meant it for little boys!

None of this playing with dolls!! Not even G.I. Joe dolls, if they still make 'em! I'm not taking any chances with MY grandson...er...uh... I mean...I HOPE he enjoys many of things his Babaw did when I was a young lad. 

I would never dream of trying to influence Roman in any particular way. That would be overstepping my boundaries, and you all know I've never been one to overstep boundaries in any kind of way.

The few incidents where I DID overstep my boundaries were totally justified in my humble opinion, even if the judge disagreed. 

Even if Roman gets enrolled in dance class, or plays (gulp), soccer, becomes captain of the chess club, or even majors in interior decorating, I will not love him any less than if he wins the International Arm Wrestling Championship Of The World!

Even though, that would be pretty AWESOME!!!

I just need to stop obsessing over what Roman will be, or not be, and leave it in God's hands.

Remember what God did with Samson? Wow! 

Remembering What I Forgot!

Okay, folks. I know most of my readers will not want to read my blog today, because I'm so late...AGAIN!

To tell you the truth, I could not think of anything encouraging to write about, until now, at 5:20 pm.

"Writers block" is very unusual for me. Normally I have so many ideas rushing through my positronic brain I can't make up my mom what to share with you guys...and gals! 

I think I got thrown off by life happening. I don't know about you, but when life happens, it can be extremely distracting!

By the way, I can only continue to write this blog until Donna comes home. Once she comes home it's her turn on the computer and I have to stop cold turkey!

I best type faster! 

So, as I was saying, before I rudely interrupted myself, I finally found something positive, uplifting, and encouraging to write about! 

It's...uh..I mean...NOW I FORGOT!!

No worries. I'll merember before I stop ex-communicating with y'all, 

I think it was my cruel, sadistic high school football coaches that are responsible for my memory loss.

They would have the whole team stand in a circle, throw a football in the middle of said circle, and we had to dive head first for the football, which led to concussions and unconsciousness, they tell me.

Of course, I have no recall of this barbaric drill, but innocent bystanders related the story to me in it's aftermath.

On the other hand, my memory malady, could be from something I wrote about in one of my books.

I think the story is in my classic book, "Chicken's Butts And Coconuts," but I don't remember for sure.

I would stand between my mom and dad in the front seat of our old Ford, that had a solid steel dashboard.

Occasionally my dad would make a quick stop, and mom would block me from bumping my punkin' head with her outstretched arm, but sometimes she was not quick enough and I'd fly head first into the immovable dashboard...my sisters told me. 

Then there was the infamous day when I walked in front of the swings and got 14 stiches in my punkin' hade, from the corner wooden seat!

No wonder I can't remember I was gonna talk about the little sparrow chasing the moth this morning. My mind is mostly mush from multitudes of mighty blows to my brain!

Hey! I merembered! 

So, you know how moths fly, right? All erratic, up, down, back and forth. As I was watching him, or her, flying so delightfully reckless abandonedly, I see a little sparrow swoop in to eat the moth, but he, or she, is having to fly just as erractically to try and catch the moth! I don't know, it just looked very comical to me. I never saw if the sparrow ever caught the moth, because they flew behind the garage and out of sight.

Not I great story? I know. I'm just happy I finally merembered it!! 

Donna's home!! I gotta go!!! 

Back To Friday Nights 1950's!!

Friday night is a great time  to do the things we've been wanting to do all week long!

1. Go to the drive-in movies. 

2. Watch a popular Friday night TV show...

Network	7:00 PM	7:30 PM	8:00 PM	8:30 PM	9:00 PM	9:30 PM	10:00 PM	10:30 PM
ABC	7:00 After the Deadlines / 7:15 Local	Life With Linkletter/Say It with Acting	Mystery Theater	The Stu Erwin Show (aka Trouble With Father)	Crime with Father	Tales of Tomorrow/Versatile Varieties*	Hollywood Premiere Theatre/The Dell O'Dell Show	Industries for America
CBS	The Stork Club	7:30 Douglas Edwards with the News / 7:45 The Perry Como Show	Mama(11/41.3)	Man Against Crime (29/32.0) (Tied with Racket Squad)	Schlitz Playhouse of Stars		Live Like a Millionaire	Hollywood Opening Night
NBC	Kukla, Fran and Ollie	7:30 The Mohawk Showroom / 7:45 Camel News Caravan	Quiz Kids	We, the People	The Big Story	The Aldrich Family	10:00 Gillette Cavalcade of Sports (19/36.5) / 10:45 Greatest Fights of the Century
DMN	Captain Video and His Video Rangers	Local	Twenty Questions	You Asked For It	Down You Go	Front Page Detective	Cavalcade of Stars

3. Get together with your Friday night Bridge group.

4. Before Bridge, you need to remove the clothes from the clothesline.

5. Maybe let the kids go out to that jitterbug contest.

6. It would be fun to take a streetcar over to Sportsman's Park for a ballgame!

7. You've saved up enough money to make a long distance call to your brother in Idaho, why not splurge a little. 

8. Order 100 White Castle hamburgers... that will only cost 5 bucks!

Well, I'm glad my time machine is working! I need to take advantage of it, before it goes on the blink again!

See ya when I get back!!

Remembering What's Important!

I took my machete and hacked my way out to the garage, to grab the lawn mower, to mow the lawn!

The incessant rains have made it next to impossiroo to do my mowing duties, and I was kinda embarrassed about the incredibly high weeds. 

 Follow her ME down to a bridge by the fountain 
Where rocking horse people eat marshmallow pies. 
Everyone smiles as you drift past the flowers WEEDS, 
That grow so incredibly high.…

Anywho, I got the dastardly deed done, and now I'm plum tuckered!

Since this is the day to remember those who sacrificed their lives for our freedom on D-Day, I will surrender my blog time to the honoring of those brave warriors!