♫♪MAGIC MUSIC MONDAYS♪♪

Hi! I'm Danny Maness,

Welcome to "Magic Music Mondays" (previously "MADNESS Music Mondays" but I changed the name to make it sound less intimidating), where I share with you music I have written, and (most of the time) performed over the last millenium  falcons of time.

I'm using soft girlish colors to subliminally lull you into a euphoric sense of trust and total submission, and then I'll hit you with  my crappy song! (And everyone says I'm so dumb! HA!)

I call this song "I Kinda Love You" because it's kinda like this dude is head over heels in love with this girl, right?

And he wants her to kinda know how he feels about her in a kinda, actions speak louder than words kinda way, right?

Is everyone kinda following me so far?

That's kinda good!

So he keeps telling her, I kinda love you, but in reality he wants her to know he really, really, REALLY loves her by telling her all of the extremely athletic, dangerous, foolhardy, devoted, and physically impossible things he would do for her to prove it!

Making sense?

I didn't think so.

Okay. Pretend you are madly in love with someone, but you can hardly speak to him or her, because you're too nervous, and don't want to come on too strong, and you're not a good conversationalist as it is.

In fact, all you can manage to say is "I kinda love you," in a soft, shy kinda way.

However, your heart is almost bursting with all of the things you'd love to say and do for this wonderful, beautiful person!

What do you do, hmmm?

You write a song for this awesome person you love so much with all your heart, and then he or she finally understands how much you adore every wonderful thing about him or her!

Now, you and me can see the evil genius in this plan, but what about the unsuspecting victim, I mean, love interest? Will he or she fall for it?

How do you think I hooked my gorgeous, adorable wife? 

You were probably wondering how a butt ugly dude like me got such a pretty wife, wern'tcha? 

I KINDA LOVE YOU

by Danny Maness

Climb every mountain,

Sail every ocean,

Write you love letters,

With deepest devotion,

Give you the stars,

Dancing above you,

And throw in the moon,

Cause I kinda love you.

Slay every dragon,

Scale every tower,

Ride a tornado,

In all of it's power,

Call on the angels,

If ever you're blue,

To sing you a song,

Cause I kinda love you.

I kinda love you,

Maybe you know,

I'm shouting it out,

Telling it all,

Letting it show,

By now I hope you see,

You mean everything to me,

My dream come true,

Cause I kinda love you.

Cross every desert,

Swim every river,

Your every desire,

Is what I'll deliver,

I'll give you the world,

And girl when I'm through,

I'd do it again,

Cause I kinda love you.

I kinda love you,

Maybe you know,

I'm shouting it out,

Telling it all,

Letting it show,

By now I hope you see,

You mean everything to me,

My dream come true,

Cause I kinda love you

This song was sponsored by the makers of  

BURMA SHAVE

(Just kidding)

EMERGENCY BLOG POST

WE INTERRUPT OUR USUAL ST. LOUIS SUNDAYS FOR AN EMERGENCY BLOG POST!!

Sara-Marie Ulsund Sticksrud is feeling a bit down.

She needs us to let her know how much we love her, need her, support her, fantasize about her! ( Just kidding about fantasizing! Do you think I'm an old little perv or something?)

Dear Sara,

The first time ever I saw your face,

Your beauty blew me away,

A sweet precious gift out of Norway,

But I thought you were from the U.K.

Your soft pleasant voice sounded British,

As your words filled my ears on that day,

I wished you were talking to lonely old me,

But I found you were talking to Jay.

I thought this was something romantic,

As you both shared your feelings so free,

Like a scene from the movie Titanic, 

On the rail, overlooking the sea.

So I thought I would stoke up the fire,

For two lovers an ocean apart,

Feeling deep silent pangs of desire,

But too shy to reveal all their heart.

So I wrote a few words of encouragement,

Hoping I could stir up love's warm winds,

Then how I was filled with discouragement,

When I found out that you were just friends.

Still I watched Sara's life lived on YouTube,

And found there was much more to find,

Than beautiful eyes and long silken hair,

You were thoughtful and gifted and kind.

You have given this old man attention,

You have lifted me up with your style,

And although I have lost some retention,

I will never forget your sweet smile.

So your legacy may not be glorious,

In your eyes maybe falling apart,

But it's lasting and true, And we know it too.

Cause it's written right here in my heart.

Danny Maness  
Move cursor under this sentence if you want to share your love for this wonderful girl. (Links will show up)
http://www.youtube.com/user/SaraMUSt
https://www.facebook.com/saramarie.stiksrud?fref=ts

SURREAL SATURDAYSsurreal saturdays

Surreal SAturdays surreal saturdaysSATURDAYS

WHEN PIGS FLY!

SURREAL SATURDAYSSURREAL

SURREAL SATURDAYS surreal saturdaysSurreal SAturdays 

surreal saturdaysSurreal SAturdaysSURREAL

 SATURDAYS

SURREAL SATURDAYS are here!

A colorful plethora of swirling beautiful thoughts of a child.

SURREAL SATURDAYS are cool!

How did you know I'm Jack Nicholson's cat?

SURREAL SATURDAYS good cheer!

I swam across, I jumped across for you, Oh what a thing to do, Cos you were all "yellow."

SURREAL SATURDAYS break the rule!

Surreal Saturdays strange days!

Dentist:-Mam, Have you been flossing regularly?

SURREAL saturdays in your brain!

WOW! This must have been one heck of a chess tournament!

SuRReal sAturdayS weird ways!

What a cold, cruel world!  I have a giant eye, and nothing to look at!

SURREAL saturdays  INSANE!!

Don't be afraid. It's alright.  Go ahead and undo  my jacket, okay?

Burrrr, that last one even gave ME chills!!

Now, lets conclude with a surreal video!

HAVE A SUPER SURREAL SATURDAY!!!

FAN FRIDAYS FAN FRIDAYS

FAN FRIDAYS FAN FRIDAYS

FAN FRIDAYS FAN FRIDAYS

I am a big fan of Joni Mitchell!

She is nothing less than perfect with her singing, playing of different musical instruments, and songwriting, in my opinion!

I believe she's the greatest singer songwriter of all time!

If you do not agree with me, ponder over these words she wrote so wonderfully:

I remember you once told me,

Love is touching souls,

Surely you touched mine,

Because part of you comes out of me,

In these lines from time to time.

Oh, you're in my blood,

You're like holy wine,

So bitter, so bitter and so sweet,

Oh, I could drink a case of you, darling,

And I would still be on my feet,

I would still be on my feet.

Now what do you think, folks?

What? Not as good as Coldplay?

Maybe you're just in love with that band, hmmm?

Although, I have to admit, "Fix You" is pretty unbelievably AMAZING!

Anyway, back to MY infatuation!

Not only can she play the guitar and piano, she is great on the auto-harp, ukulele, AND DULCIMER!!

Come on, who else plays the dulcimer?)

Look at this next video and be totally amazed!

Let's see if Coldplay could do this! Just kidding, just kidding!

I know a lot of you reading this think the only reason I fell in love with her in the first place is because of her angelic beauty and lean sexy body.

Well, I never!!!

But, I wish I could have!!!

(kissed her)

If any of you out there happen to know Joni, please send me her phone number, and I promise I won't start stalking her, or bugging her every minute, like I might have  done in my wicked, obsessive, compulsive youth!

Joni

A sweeter voice I've never heard,

Like a mother singing to a babe,

Joni lingers in my heart,

My love for her will never fade.

Man, that is WAY too corny and mushy for my style of writing! YUUCK!!

I'll leave it in, anyway.

THOUGHTFUL THURSDAYS

I always write Thoughtful Thursdays in soft, non-threatening colors to illustrate the way I  want us to feel on this day of contemplative meditation, and total self awareness.

I invite you to close your tired eyes, (never mind, you won't be able to read this if you close your eyes) I mean, imagine your eyes are closed.

Now, take a long deep breath..in with the good air, out with the bad...in with the good air, out with the bad...Ahhhhhh!

Didn't that feel awesome?

What do you mean, no?

Without your total submission and cooperation this ain't gonna work, Bosko!

Why not try lying down?

Maybe that's the probleemo. 

Take off those shoes, lie down and relaaaax, relaaaaaaaax, relaaaaaaaaaaaaax....

Now, think of the most wonderful places you've ever been, and the happiest times of your life!

You've never been to any wonderful places? Not even Disney World?

Well then, what about happy times? 

I don't think the time the dogs ate your brother was happy.

He was that ornery, huh?

I know...  let your favorite music fill your imagination of the mind, and virtually float away on the wings of the melody of your heart.

You only like "grunge," huh? Well, that ain't gonna help!

You know, you're REALLY starting to tick me off! 

I'm trying to do a traditional "Thoughtful Thursdays" and you're blowing my gig! 

You are supposed to be calm, serene, tranquil, at peace, and you are being an obsinate, stubborn little...

Uh, I mean, umm, I can, uh, truly feel your pain, and, uh, realize you must have many issues to deal with that prevents you from trusting others, correct?

I'm afraid that making obscene gestures, and saying that about my mama will put a real damper on our communication efforts!

Where do you want me to stick my blog?!!

That does it, you big jerk! I've been tryin' to help your sorry butt, and you refuse to let me!!

Well, go ahead and be a mean, unthankful bully for the rest of your life....Grandma!!!

WHO?WHAT?WHERE?

WHEN?WHY?HOW?

WEDNESDAYS!!!

Who? What? Where? When? Why? How? Wednesdays are when I get to ask all the mind probing questions, and you provide the witty, profound answers!

Example of Glirkazoid Mind Probe

Are you ready for this? 

Have you rigorously studied ahead of time?

Yes?

How could you have? I'm making this up as I go along!

This will be a timed test, so answer quickly, and if you don't know an answer, stay on it until your times up.

READY? BEGIN!

Question 1. What is Coldplay?

a. Children making snowmen.

b. Eskimos making whoopie.

c. A band.

d. Canada's outdoor theater in January.

Question 2. Who or what is this?

Hint: Not Brad Pitt!

Question 3. Where are the dead Bigfoots?

a. They evaporate at death.

b. They are immortal, like Adrian Paul.

c. Bigfoots eat their dead.

d. They are raptured to Bigfoot Paradise.

Question 4. True or False: Madonna is not REALLY a virgin.

Question 5. Fill in the blank: "And the sign said ____ _____ ______ ______ need not apply."

Hint 

Question 6. Fill in the blank: "So I ___ __ __ ____ __ _____ __ ___ and I went in to ask him ___.

Question 7. Fill in the blank: He said, you look like a ____ __________ _____ ___ I think you'll do.

Question 8. Fill in the blank: " So I took off my hat and said imagine that, huh, me ______ for you!

Question 9. Name the band that did the afore mentioned song. (Ha! This one's not so easy, is it?) HINT: FMEB.

Question 9. Why isn't this question 10?

Question 10. Shouldn't this really be question 11?

Question ?. In 1o,000 worms or less, tell our viewers why this is the weirdest blog you've ever read. (Worms?)

TIME

magazine

Submit your answers to  Erkel Press in Omaha, New Orleans Parish Kentucky.

Thank you for your precipitation!