OUT OF THIS WORLD WEDNESDAY

The extreme blackness of the cave was only an eensy weensy obstacle, compared to the 2 headed, shark toothed, "growler," that was remaining ever so quiet in hopes that Gary and Yellow Rose would stumble into his or her clutches! (It's hard to discern the sex of a "growler" without risking your life!)

The caves on the planet of Mimmerritt were known for their beautiful, gigantic rock formations, stalactites, stalagmites, and...and...uh, oh...ferocious "growler beasts" that would slink out of the caves at night to eat unsuspecting victims of the Mimmerritt population! 

Gary and Yellow Rose had been sent by the High Command of the planet Glirka, (the Supreme Glirkheads) to rid this defenseless planet from these terrifying critters!

Gary - "How many of these cockadoodie "growlers" have we emulsificated so far, Y.R.?"

Yellow Rose - "At last count, it was 222."

Gary - "How many more do we need to emulsificate?"

Yellow Rose - "This is it, Gary, and then we can head to our next extremely exciting and dangerous adventure!"

Gary - "Cool, Y.R.! Y.R.? Yellow Rose? Are you playing a joke on me? Where are you hiding?" 

Gary shines his light all around and Yellow Rose is GONE! All he can hear is the incessant growling of the "beast!"

We will be back to Out Of This World Wednesday in just a few moments, but now a word from our sponsor...

Gary's pulse began to pound at a high rate of speed, like the intro to the Hawaii Five o theme song, and sweat poured out of his sweat glands profusely as Grape Nehi! 

Did the nasty growler beast EAT Yellow Rose? Does he have her roasting on a spit? Is she, sniff, sniff, (a tear) gone FOREVER?

We will return to the amazing adventures of Yellow Rose and Gary after this brief message...

Gary - "Yellow Rose is NOT gone forever!" I can sense she is still alive somewhere in this dark, wet, dank, droomy cave, I mean gloomy cave, and if it takes 1000 years I'll find my pardner!"

What was that? Did Gary just hear the sound of Y.R's voice? 

Thank you for tuning in to OUT OF THIS WORLD WEDNESDAY once again! Join us next week to find out if Yellow Rose survives! 

This episode of Out Of This World Wednesday was brought to you by...

VOLKSWAGEN

OUT OF THIS WORLD WEDNESDAY

Gary - (Awakens from a deep sleep!) "Yellow Rose...Yellow Rose! I just suffered through the most horrific nightmare ever!"

Yellow Rose - "Well, don't tell me about it until you eat breakfast!" 

Gary - "Why is that?"

Yellow Rose - "I don't know...that's what my Mama always told me."

Gary - "Okay, then hand me that pop tart and I'll tell you." (Gary talking with his mouth full) The Subreme Glirbheads send down an edict thad all mizzions by ALL da Glirbazoid oberadives would be canzelled, kapoot..."

Yellow Rose - "Gary! Stop talking with your mouth full, and speak in plain Glirkazoidian!"

Gary - "Sorry, I was just trying to tell you that in my nightmare, we were canned, fired, retired, discharged, sent out to pasture..."

Yellow Rose - "I get it, Gary, but you know those silly dreams never come true! As long as you don't tell anyone the details before breakfast."

Gary - "Oh, no! I told you about my nightmare DURING breakfast! Will all this come true now?"

Yelow Rose - "Don't you never mind about any of that superstitious stuff, Gary. We will ALWAYS go on our super, amazing, exciting missions together! Heck or high water!"

Gary - "So, it was all just a bad dream?"

Yellow Rose - "Yep! How could the universe survive without us, Gary?"

Sept. 11, 2001

Breaking news...an accident? A plane crashed into a building...New York City...oh, how tragic...was it pilot error or mechanical failure? Wait...oh, my god...ANOTHER plane has hit the other tower...this is no accident...is this an attack?! I want to turn it off and pretend it didn't happen...but that's impossible...I feel like I'm in shock and cannot turn my head away...it's almost the same feeling as when Kennedy was shot...but even worse in a lot of ways...I'm seeing this as it's happening...the massive amount of smoke ...and...what?! Oh, my God! One tower is crumbling like when an old building is demolished with explosives...my, God! How can a plane crash at the top cause the whole building to crumble like a house of cards? This doesn't make sense! Dear Lord...now the other building is crumbling in the same exact way! Something internal is causing this...planes crashing into the TOP of buildings could not make them disintegrate like this! This must be a bad dream...and...Oh, God...I'm so ashamed...the people...the burning, crushed, terrified people inside those buildings! I need to stop watching and pray for them! Dear God, please help those innocent people who are trapped in those burning buildings, keep them safe, and strong through this horrible, frightening time! In Jesus name, Amen!

We all remember these horrifying events and how we felt on that day. We also remember the sadness and heartache we felt as the details were slowly revealed...the death toll, the terrified passengers on the planes, the brave ones who fought the hijackers and gave their lives with a pure love that is beyond what most of us have ever seen...and the heartbreaking and wonderfully faith strengthening words of the victims families, that brought us to tears..and more tears!

I know it's very hard, but recall all those memories to your mind, and remember...remember...

remember ..

the DAY that has to be remembered!

OUT OF THIS WORLD WEDNESDAY

True Heroes Of The Universe

True heroes of the universe,

Like Yellow Rose and Gary,

Conquer monsters big and mean,

Ugly, bad and hairy.

True heroes of the universe,

Have love for every creature,

Regardless of their color,

Or strange exotic features.

They put the problems of others,

Ahead of even their own,

When going on a mission,

They never cry and moan.

They love all little babies,

No matter what their species,

They will even change their diapers,

Filled with stinky feces. 

Yellow Rose is gentle,
And kind to alien races,
But they better not hurt others,
Or she'll emulsificate their faces!

Our heroes are a legend,
To all the Glirkazoids,
They both have been drug tested,
And they're not taking "roids."

Their strength comes  from above,
An Angel who's called Nonna,
Who guides them every day,
And looks like my wife Donna! 

Love makes them a mighty team,
And gives them awesome power,
The Earth needs them so badly,
Like a garden needs a flower.

True heroes of the universe,
Are not that hard too see,
Just look at folks around you,
They're a lot like you and me!

OUT OF THIS WORLD SATURDAY

SPECIAL SATURDAY EDITION

Gary was concerned about Yellow Rose and wanted to cheer her up a bit.

She was usually fired up about their thrilling missions, but lately she seemed a bit...blah. 

Gary - "Okay, Y.R., spit it out. What's wrong?"

Yellow Rose - "It's just that the whole universe seems out of whack, Gary. Even when we save a billion inhabitants of a doomed galaxy, destroy an evil space monster, or teach "The Dance Of Joy" to a whole population, bad things still happen! I'm about to give up."

Gary - "You know what you need to do, Yellow Rose?"

Yellow Rose - "What?" (She says through little pink tears)

Gary - "Pray...and I'll pray WITH you!"

Yellow Rose - "I've never heard you mention prayer before, Gary! I thought you were too self sufficient to pray."

Gary - "No way, Y.R.! I'm a praying fool! I just don't flaunt it!"

Yellow Rose - "Well, you learn something new every day! I pray too, but I feel like God doesn't always answer my prayers."

Gary - "Sure he does, you just don't know it!"

Yellow Rose - "I don't get what you mean."

Gary - "Okay, let's say you pray for perfect health, and you're sick all the time. God is allowing this to...

All of a sudden, a pure, bright shining blue light appears in the spaceship...Yellow Rose and Gary fall on their faces, because they are sore afraid! The appearance of the most beautiful Angel you could ever imagine transforms before them, and begins to speak!

"I AM THE ANGEL WHO WATCHES OVER GLIRKAZOIDS! FEAR NOT, BECAUSE I HAVE COME TO BRING YOU GREAT TIDINGS OF GLAD JOY, OR IS IT THE OTHER WAY AROUND? ANYWAY, YOUR PRAYERS HAVE NOT GONE UNANSWERED...IN GOD'S DUE TOM, ALL THINGS WILL BE MADE RIGHT AND BLESSINGS WILL FLOW TO YOU TWO FAITHFUL ONES PRESSED DOWN AND SHAKEN TO THE FULL MEASURE OF BOUNTIFULNESS! BE PATIENT AND WAITETH ON THE HAND OF THE LORD!"

In a fraction of a second, the beautiful, glorious Angel... vanishes!

Yellow Rose - "WOW! That was wonderful! 

She said exactly what I needed to hear!"

Gary - "How do you know the Angel was a she? I thought Angels were neutral in that area." 

Yellow Rose - "You dummy! With that pretty face, long flowing hair, soft sweet voice, and lovely form fitting gown, ANYONE could see that she's a female Angel...lame brain!"

Gary - "I'm glad you're back to your old self, Yellow Rose!" Ready to go on the mission?"

Yellow Rose - "Ready, willing and able, my friend! Let's roll!" 

My...how I LOVE happy endings!!

OUT OF THIS WORLD WEDNESDAY

Spaze...The final frontier...these are the voyages of the Silver Sausage spaceship...

...going boldly to where no ..uh... Silver Sausage has ever gone before...with Yellow Rose and Gary (both cute little Glirkazoids) exploring new worms...I mean, worlds...discovering new civilizations...conquering evil...and basically having a great tom!

Who's Tom? 

The vast expanse of space is even larger than we can imagine in our puny little brains...in fact...we can hardly comprehend the half-vast expanse of space! If it weren't for a special invention of the great Glirkazoidan scientist Galbert Glinestein, that combines time travel, warp speed, internal combustion, and sails, the Silver Sausage would never get ANYWHERE on tom! 

You can't count on Tom for ANYTHING!

By the way, Glinestein's invention is called the Sailbustionwarptime Propulsion System.

I REALLY should not get into all this technogynocological stuff...it's way above your heads...and mine, too! 

The most important thing are the exciting adventures of the legendary Gary the Glirkazoid and his partner Glirkazoid, Yellow Rose! 












Gary - "Well, Yellow Rose, here we are, off on another dangerous, spine tingling, death defying mission, to rid a vulnerable planet of some devastating threat that could emulsificate them...or WORSE!"

Yellow Rose - (Filing her nails)"Whatever."

Gary - "Whatever? Whatever?!! Aren't you totally pumped about saving another doomed planet?!"

Yellow Rose - "I guess so."

Gary - "What's wrong Y.R.? You don't seem like yourself today?"

WHAT IS GOING ON WITH YELLOW ROSE?

IS SHE SICK?

IS SOMETHING ON HER MIND?

WELL, YOU WILL NEVER KNOW...UNLESS YOU CLICK ON NEXT WEEK'S OUT OF THIS WORLD WEDNESDAY, WEDNESDAY, WEDNESDAY...

This has nothing to do with Yellow Rose and Gary, but I thought it was cool!!

OUT OF THIS WORLD WEDNESDAY

Hello boys and gorillas! During our last excursion into OUT OF THIS WORM WEDNESDAY, the whole galdurn Earth was surrounded by an armada of warships from the gigantic planet of Wrychus 1!

The Earth was sucking so bad, with it's wars and rumors of wars, pollution out the wazoo, corruption, incomprehensible ice bucket dysfunction, and the heartbreak of psoriasis, that the Wrychus 1 KILLER SHIPS were just about ready to obliterate the pathetic place we like to call Urth! 

Having trouble remembering the last episode? Listen to the song I wrote about the whole deal, okay? 

And this Tom, REALLY listen to it and don't cop out like a worm! 

Wrychus 1 Commander - "This stupid planet is hopeless! Get ready to emulsificate them on my count! One, two, buckle my shoe..."

First Leftenent Qwerty - "Commander, I see special activity going on the surface of this potentially doomed planet, through our stare-a-scope!"

Commander - (Pushes Leftenent Qwerty out of the way) "Let me see this, so called, activity!"

What they saw was something beyond miraculous, more wonderful than the bottom of a banana split when all of the sweet goodness runs together, more unbelievable than Angelina Jolie calling me...the inhabitants of this miserable planet were doing the ancient, life saving, "Dance Of Joy," that was taught to them by the legendary Yellow Rose and Gary! 

Of course, universal law states that if any of the inhabitants of a doomed planet does the "Dance Of Joy," they MUST NOT be destroyed!

Hallelujah! Because of our lovable little heroes, the Earth is saved! In addition, the Earthlings promise to clean up the whole place and stop their stinking wars! 

I LOVE happy endings, don't you?

Asian Carpnado Tuesday...Yaaaay!!!!!!!

Brilliant ideas don't come along every day.

Or even every week! In fact, I'm not sure if I ever had a brilliant idea, but Jeff Hanneman sure did!

Note Jeff Hanneman's name on the awesome movie poster.

By the way, MY name is on there too! Ha!!

Mr. Hanneman was the dude who came up with the Asian Carpnado idea, and The Greg and Dan Radio Show has taken Jeff's idea to new heights!

They now have an Asian Carpnado movie in the works (I incidentally, wrote the theme for the movie), a movie trailer, a fantastic movie poster, an Asian Carnado tee shirt...

and Lord knows what's coming next!

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=857598764257941

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=859678227383328

I actually recorded two versions of the Asian Carpnado theme song, but I need to find out which one YOU like best!

Here they are, starting with the first version and ending with the second version!

It's important we get input from YOU on this, so we will know which one to use in the real life movie! 

Ain't this exiting?!

Just think about it! What if you had been in on the decision of every movie theme? 

The Theme to The Magnificent 7, the Goldfinger theme, the Chariots of Fire theme, theme to Exodus (one of the greatest), the theme to Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles....

Wouldn't you be as proud as Polly's pickles?!

Sure you would! So after picking your favorite, let me know in the comments section! 

Like they would say thank you in Germany...Donkey shame! 

ASIAN CARPNADO FRIDAY

The world was stunned when the news came out of Central Illinois that a series of "Asian carpnados" had wreaked havoc across the Illinois plain, with massive amounts of death and destruction in it's wake!

An "Asian carpnado" occurs when the swirling, violent, turbulent winds of a tornado, suck up Asian carp from a body of water and then toss the razor finned fish at such a high velocity that nothing can withstand the deadly force! 

The courageous efforts of Peoria's local heroes, Greg and Dan, saved countless lives and created a new industry for eager entrepreneurs..."carp on a stick."

They are also in the process of making a documentary/ thriller/ madcap comedy movie that chronicles all of the historic events that took place on that fateful day! 

The cool part is that they allowed me to write the theme song for the movie! Yaaaaay! Here it is: