OUT OF THIS WORLD WEDNESDAY

EPISODE FOUR

When we last visited Rosie and Gary, they had crash landed on the murderous, odorous planet of Pluberus, and Rosie had slipped outside of the Silver Sausage spazeship to do repairs. 

Gary - (Looking out of the porthole) "Rosie!!! What are you doing out there! Pluberus is one of the most dangerous planets in the universe, except for Aureolus, where the Amazing Amazonian Aardvarks suck the meat from your body!"

Of course, Rosie could not hear him, because in outer space, NO ONE CAN HEAR A WARNING!!

-

While Gary begins to gather up all the gear he will need to go out and protect his faithful companion, Rosie feels a disturbance in the phorz! (Incidentally...the phorz is a weird feeling Glirkazoids get when they are in danger)

Gary  - "Let's see, I'll need my laser proof  spaze suit, my super sized emulsificator weapon, my lunch box, a pair of tweezers..."

Rosie - (Still outside of the ship, talking to herself) 

"I sense danger, but I can't contact Gary because I forgot my communicator! I'm sure he'll come out here soon! "

Gary - "I can't forget my chapstick, creature repellant, my lucky grabbit foot (It wasn't so 

lucky for the grabbit, was it), a Mars bar, my 

photo of Steve Urkel ..."

The planet of Pluberous is so foreboding, as if all of the evil darkness, forgotten junk yards, horrible, frightening creatures, and all the yucky mucous, from all over the universe, has converged on this one, God forsaken sphere! 

As we focus back in on our dear, sweet Rosie, who is dilligently screwing the cull shield back on the Silver Sausage spazeship, the background music begins to play very quietly, and then increases to a louder crescendo...like this music below...

Behind Rosie, we begin to see the form of a gigantic, terrifying lifeform, and we can hear it snarling at our adorable Rosie...

Gary - " I also need to take my handy dandy flashlight, 

my ancient Samurai sword, my latest copy of  Universal Inquirer..."

Rosie spins around with a super quick, kick-yo-bot move, and faces the enormous alien beast confronting her in the pitch blackness of the Pluberus landscape! 

The beast is so ugly and humongous, (about 200 meters tall) mere words cannot describe it, so here is a picture worth a thousand worms...

Oh my!

I hope Gary gets his gear ready!

That's a fierce lookin' beast!

How tall is 2oo meters, you ask? 

656.168 feet!! 

That's taller than the St. Louis Arch!

NEXT WEEK THE MIGHTY BATTLE ENSUES!!!

Don't miss EPISODE FIVE of OUT OF THIS WORLD WEDNESDAY!!!!

OUT OF THIS WORLD WEDNESDAY
EPISODE 3

You may, or may not, recall when Humphey Bogart (AKA Charlie Allnut) had to get out of the African Queen boat, and pull it through the shallow waters of the Ulanga river with a rope, and his face showed how agonizingly painful this must have been!

When he climbed back into the boat, he discovered he was covered in LEECHES, and he hated leeches worse than Indiana Jones hated snakes! 

To make things worse, he had to go back in the water, with the stinking leeches, and pull the boat some more!!! 

If you have no idea what I'm talkng about, look at this clip starting at about 11:32...

By now, you're probably wondering if I have a point, right?

My point is...uh...I mean...umm...NOW I REMEMBER!

The horrific ordeals that Rosie and Gary will endure on the planet of Pluberus, will be a billion toms worse than what Charlie and Rosie (A different Rosie) went through on the Ulanga!!

PLUBERUS

Gary - "What a rough landing, Rosie! Doesn't Pluberus have any smooth surfaces? I felt like I was a pinball!"

Rosie - "What's a pinball?"

Gary - "A pinball is a little silver ball that bounces around in all different directions in an ancient Earth game."

Rosie - "You mean, like in the Pinball Wizard song?"

Gary - "Yeah! Yeah! Just like in the Pinball Wizard song!!"

Rosie - "Never heard of it!" 

Rosie loved messing with Gary's little mind, just to get him worked up and frazzled.

Gary - "ROSIE! Here we are, crash landed on an ultra-dangerous, bumpy, smelly, uncomfortably moist, enemy filled planet...and you're messin' with my mom...I mean...me mum...I'm tryin' to say...MY MIND!!! Aaaaaarg!!!!"

Rosie - "Sorry. Just trying to lighten the mood, under the difficult circumstances."

Gary - "Difficult circumstances?! I'm sure you know that no creatures have ever landed on Pluberus and lived to tell the tale, right?"

Rosie - "Puzzle me this. If NO ONE ever lived to tell about it, how do we know no one ever survived, hmmm?" 

Gary - "The Pluberusians brag about it, knucklehead! It's legendary! EVERYBODY has seen their videos of them emulsificating ANY and ALL creatures that have "invaded" their planet, whether they crash landed by accident or not!" 

Rosie - "Well, you know we're gonna have to go outside the spazeship to repair the damage, right?"

Gary - "What do you mean, WE, girl?! It's way too dangerous for you to go out there! Rosie? Where did you go, Rosie?!"

Gary fears the worst...looks out of the porthole, and sees Rosie OUTSIDE, repairing the damage to the Silver Sausage!

What terrifying, treacherous tribulation will befall our sweet Rosie?

Will Gary be in time to rescue Rosie from a ruinous, reckless T. Rex, or something even more deadly?!!

Join us next week for Episode 4 of OUT OF THIS WORLD WEDNESDAY!!!!

OUT OF THIS WORLD WEDNESDAY
EPISODE TWO

Love of life.

The powerful transformation 

of something more relevant...more ALIVE.

Reaching out to grasp the 

stars, 

with the thrilling expectation

 of 

unending 

joy.

The revelation of the simple truth that giving to others 

is more 

valuable than the 

purest 

gold.

The spontaneous, thrilling, magnification of compassion, empathy, and perfect love.

All of the aforementioned are the attributes, goals, and desires of our great and fearless spaze cowboys...uh...I mean...cowboy and cowgirl...Gary and Rosie, who have just crashed landed on the nasty, undesirable planet of Pluberus...

PLUBERUS

Ancient Spaze Poem 
That Describes Pluberus

Pluberus is nasty,
Pluberus is icky,
Everything you touch there,
Is slimy, wet and sticky.

Everyone on Pluberus,
Is ugly, mean and cruel,
Their noses drip with snot,
And their lips all drip with drool.

The odor there on Pluberus,
Can make a piggy gag,
And loving kindness can't be found,
They just nag and nag and nag.

If you are a stranger,
 on Pluberus, you're sunk,
They'll hunt you down, immediately,
Just like a dirty skunk. 

So if you ever land on Pluberus,
Go ahead and have a cry,
'Cause if they get a hold of you,
You can kiss your arse goodbye!

Gary - "Out of all the trillions of miserable planets in the universe, 
and all the gin joints on all the asteroids that float in the darkest regions of spaze, we had to crash land on PLUBERUS!"

Rosie - "Well, let's look on the bright side, shall we? Okay, there is no bright side, but we've ALWAYS escaped impossible situations before, haven't we?"

Gary - "Yes, Rosie, but this time is different!"

Different?

What does Gary mean? 

Is this the end of our faithful warriors who fight for the downtrodden and disenfranchised?

What can possibly be on Pluberus that could defeat our dysfunctional duo?

Find the answers to these questions...and more...in next week's OUT OF THIS WORLD WEDNESDAY!!!

OUT OF THIS WORLD WEDNESDAY

Rosie - (Sitting at the dashboard of the Silver Sausage Spazeship) "It looks like we're gonna be entering a big debris field, Gary! So hold on to your tussie!"

Gary - "I'm holding on to it, Rosie!"

Rosie - "I said, YOUR tussie, not mine, you...you...MALE!!"

Gary - "It was an honest mistake, Rosie. It's dark in outer spaze!"

Rosie - "Yeah, but it's not dark here in the COCKPIT! 

Gary starts laughing, hysterically.

Rosie - "What are you laughing about, Gary? You think the word, cockpit, is funny? You're so childish!!"

At that, they enter the deadly, devastating, dastardly, DEBRIS FIELD!! 

BOOM...BOOM...CRASH...SCRAAAPE...

SMASH...BUMP...SMACK...BING...BANG...

BONG...BOOM...BOING...BOING...BOOM...

BOOM...CRASH...SCRAAAPE...

SMASH...BUMP...SMACK...BING...BANG...

BONG...BOOM...BOING...BOING!!!

Gary - "WOWWEE! That was a wild and cwazy debris field!" 

Rosie - "It really was, but it's not pronounced the way it's spelled, Gary! It's pronounced, da-bree."

Gary - "You're weird, Rosie! I've always pronounced it de-bris!"

Rosie - "I know! You also say Wed-nes-day, instead of Wendsday, iz-land, instead of i-land, and Co-lo-nel, instead of Kernal!"

Gary - "Absolutely, my friend! Now lets celebrate making it through the debris field by drinking some cham-pag-nee!"

Rosie - "You're hopeless, my funny friend!"

All of a sudden, the Silver Sausage starts to stutter and sputter, hiss and spew, hokie and pokie, and spin and spiral...

Rosie - "Gary! Going through the debris field must have caused severe damage to the ship!! We need to land this thing on the nearest planet to repair the damage, before we lose all power and control, and drift in the endless blackness of spaze, until we perish!!!"

Gary - "You are so dramatic, Rosie, but always correct! So, let's put down on Pluberus, which is the nearest planet to us."

Pluberus

Rosie - "Pluberus?!! We can't land on Pluberus!! Are you insane!!!"

Gary - "We have no choice, Rosie.

Chihuahua! 

What is the problem with Pluberus?

Is it a pitiful planet with piranhas and pit bulls?

Are there painful plagues and poisoned Pepsi?

Come back next week to find out on...

OUT OF THIS WORLD WEDNESDAY

As the Silver Sausage Spazeship makes it's way across the universe...one of my favorite Beatles songs...

I like this "outtake" version!

to recue the Glirkazoidian captives, they are visited by Big Gaz...prognosticator, soothsayer, sage, parsley, all knowing, all seeing, predictor, prenatal, aboriginal man of all trades, master of some!

However, he doesn't beam in like most visitors. Oh, no! He seeps in, like a fine mist, and then forms himself together into a big, giant head, like the Wizard of Oz, but without the fire.

Rumor has it that Big Gaz is from a place called OZ. No one really knows.

Big Gaz speaks in his strange, almost indecipherable language..."Gadday, mites! Ows it angin, ya bloody bloke and sheila!"

Rosie - "Nothing hanging here, Big Gaz, but would you please speak in Glirkazoidian so we can understand you better?" 

Big Gaz - "Onya, mate! I mean, okay "sugar bunny!" Is that better?"

Rosie - "Wow! You even know the Glirkazoid "street language"...very impressive!"

Gary - "Watch who you're callin' sugar bunny, Big Gaz! She's my g..., I mean, uh...GREAT spaze companion!" 

Gig Gaz - "I get it, buddy, (winks at Gary) you don't want Big Gaz hornin' in on your squeeze, huh?" 

Gary - "She's not my "squeeze," Big Gaz! I've NEVER laid a hand on her!"

Big Gaz - "Don't forget, stud, Big Gaz is ALL KNOWING and ALL SEEING!"

Rosie - "Come on, guys! Cut the crap, and let's get to what Big Gaz wants to tell us!"

Big Gaz - "Oh, yeah, I almost forgot! Guess the identity of the two captives you're about to rescue!" 

Gary - "It's gotta be two of the Supreme Glirkheads, right?"

Big Gaz - "El no no!"

Rosie - "The presidents of Glirka, Glarrock and Glichelle Oglama?"

Big Gaz - "Nada, no way! Give up?"

Rosie and Gary - "Yeah, we give up."

Big Gaz - "Okay, it's none other than both of your parents, Greg and Rita! I'm so sorry!"

Rosie and Gary look at each other...and then begin to laugh their arses off! (Glirkazoids LITERALLY laugh their arses off, but then they grow back the next day)

Gary - "My dad? Ha ha ha ha, oh, the poor kidnapper, that old fart will drive Lord Demonica up a wall!"

Rosie - "Hee hee, haw haw haw, my mom will give him a heart attack from stress and fear!!"

Big Gaz - "They can't be THAT bad, can they?"

Rosie - "I thought you were all knowing and seeing?"

Big Gaz - "Well...I'm kinda, MOSTLY all knowing and seeing, but nobody's perfect!"

We are now transported to the uncomfortable planet of Anti-Morpheus...

Anti-Morpheus...a planet so uncomfortable that no one can sleep!

Lord Demonica - "When will Rosie and Gary show up to rescue these stubborn old Glirkazoids?!! They are driving me INSANE!!

The ugly Lord Demonica

Greg - "Hey, Demmy! Turn up the heat! It's like an ice box in this tiny cell!"

Lord Demonica - "Stop calling me Demmy! It sounds like dummy! Address me as Lord Demonica!"

Greg - "Sure thing, Demmy! You know, if you were any uglier, I'd puke! "Speaking of puking, what kind of slop are you feeding us in here? It tastes like Pigillion Poop!"

Rita - "That's not all, you goat headed moron, this place stinks like the Rancid Sea Of Mucus, on the planet of Phartz!"

Lord Demonica - "Be silent! Don't you know I could destroy you in a nano second?!"

Rosie - "Yes, you could, but we also realize you ain't gonna, because we're no good to you dead!

You're using us as bait, to lure in our kids, so you can ambush and murderize THEM, you big COWARD!!"

Lord Demonica - (Places his claw-like hands over his ears) "Shut up!! Shut up!! I pity Gary and Rosie for having abominable parents like you two!!

I'm releasing you at once! Go away, be gone! Aye yi yi, you've given me such a headache!!"

Back aboard the Silver Sausage...

Rosie - "Look, Gary! We just received a message from my mom and your dad.

"Lord Demonica released them, and they are headed back to Glirka."

Gary - "Took him long enough! Were they able to swipe the plans to all of Lord Demonica's weapons systems?"

Rosie - "Right from under his... I was gonna say nose, but he really only has an ugly hole."

Gary - "Ha! I'm so proud of them! 

They still got it!!"